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Xanthippe watched with smug satisfaction as two of the other servants pulled the buck off her borrowed gelding’s back, rushing to help support the beast as the trio carried the deer inside. It was her first kill of the season, and this one was special. This one, she was going to give Melina.
It had been a week or so since Melina had dropped a casual comment at supper on their recent lack of venison and how much she enjoyed the meat. That comment had the wheels of Xanthippe’s mind turning, immediately planning when she could next go out on the hunt and a bag a deer for her beloved mistress. She could imagine the look of joy on Melina’s face when she brought the animal back and presented it to her, and how much further it would put her in the younger woman’s favor. Xanthippe wanted to be useful to the woman she served, not just in helping her dress or style her hair. She wanted to do everything for her, to ensure she was always happy. When she found an opportunity to do that, she was definitely going to take it.
She was practically falling over herself with joy as she walked inside with the two men, setting the carcass down on one of the long tables in the kitchen. A rare smile beamed from her face at the other two, thanking them profusely. The men nodded in acceptance, looking at her a little askance. How had she managed to kill and bag that thing on her own? Had she drug the beast on the horse’s back herself? Xanthippe was a strange member of the Leventi household, but given his lordship’s favor of her, the men declined to comment, simply bid her farewell and went their own way.
“Oh, she will be so pleased,” Xanthippe said to herself as took a wet cloth to the bloodied bits of her skin. Her chiton was dark enough to disguise the splotches that stained it, but she didn’t want her surprise immediately ruined when she went to fetch Melina. If she saw her skin dotted with blood, it would give it away, and they couldn’t have that!
Do you know what would have been a better gift?
What’s that?
The head of one of those Mikaelidas boys who dared to insult her.
Yes, it would have been a better gift, but a bit harder to obtain.
Figure it out.
Maybe one day.
Glancing down at herself, she thought she’d done a good enough job of cleaning herself off that her mistress wouldn’t immediately notice anything was amiss. With a quick nod, she left the kitchens, her heart fluttering with eager anticipation. Gods, she could just imagine how excited Melina would be! That look of delight on her face when she saw what Xan had done… oh, it was going to be perfect!
Stopping at the door of Melina’s bedroom, she knocked politely before peeking her inside with a grin. “My lady, are you in here?” Spotting her mistress off toward the side, she entered the room fully and approached Melina with an unusual bounce in her step. “Are you busy?” she asked, a plaintive hope on her face. “I got you something, but you have to come to the kitchens first. It’s a surprise!”
Had she been a dog, Xanthippe’s tail would have wagged, her face full of secretive excitement. “Come on!” she urged her, her smile widening. “Don’t you want to see?”
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This character is currently a work in progress.
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Xanthippe watched with smug satisfaction as two of the other servants pulled the buck off her borrowed gelding’s back, rushing to help support the beast as the trio carried the deer inside. It was her first kill of the season, and this one was special. This one, she was going to give Melina.
It had been a week or so since Melina had dropped a casual comment at supper on their recent lack of venison and how much she enjoyed the meat. That comment had the wheels of Xanthippe’s mind turning, immediately planning when she could next go out on the hunt and a bag a deer for her beloved mistress. She could imagine the look of joy on Melina’s face when she brought the animal back and presented it to her, and how much further it would put her in the younger woman’s favor. Xanthippe wanted to be useful to the woman she served, not just in helping her dress or style her hair. She wanted to do everything for her, to ensure she was always happy. When she found an opportunity to do that, she was definitely going to take it.
She was practically falling over herself with joy as she walked inside with the two men, setting the carcass down on one of the long tables in the kitchen. A rare smile beamed from her face at the other two, thanking them profusely. The men nodded in acceptance, looking at her a little askance. How had she managed to kill and bag that thing on her own? Had she drug the beast on the horse’s back herself? Xanthippe was a strange member of the Leventi household, but given his lordship’s favor of her, the men declined to comment, simply bid her farewell and went their own way.
“Oh, she will be so pleased,” Xanthippe said to herself as took a wet cloth to the bloodied bits of her skin. Her chiton was dark enough to disguise the splotches that stained it, but she didn’t want her surprise immediately ruined when she went to fetch Melina. If she saw her skin dotted with blood, it would give it away, and they couldn’t have that!
Do you know what would have been a better gift?
What’s that?
The head of one of those Mikaelidas boys who dared to insult her.
Yes, it would have been a better gift, but a bit harder to obtain.
Figure it out.
Maybe one day.
Glancing down at herself, she thought she’d done a good enough job of cleaning herself off that her mistress wouldn’t immediately notice anything was amiss. With a quick nod, she left the kitchens, her heart fluttering with eager anticipation. Gods, she could just imagine how excited Melina would be! That look of delight on her face when she saw what Xan had done… oh, it was going to be perfect!
Stopping at the door of Melina’s bedroom, she knocked politely before peeking her inside with a grin. “My lady, are you in here?” Spotting her mistress off toward the side, she entered the room fully and approached Melina with an unusual bounce in her step. “Are you busy?” she asked, a plaintive hope on her face. “I got you something, but you have to come to the kitchens first. It’s a surprise!”
Had she been a dog, Xanthippe’s tail would have wagged, her face full of secretive excitement. “Come on!” she urged her, her smile widening. “Don’t you want to see?”
Xanthippe watched with smug satisfaction as two of the other servants pulled the buck off her borrowed gelding’s back, rushing to help support the beast as the trio carried the deer inside. It was her first kill of the season, and this one was special. This one, she was going to give Melina.
It had been a week or so since Melina had dropped a casual comment at supper on their recent lack of venison and how much she enjoyed the meat. That comment had the wheels of Xanthippe’s mind turning, immediately planning when she could next go out on the hunt and a bag a deer for her beloved mistress. She could imagine the look of joy on Melina’s face when she brought the animal back and presented it to her, and how much further it would put her in the younger woman’s favor. Xanthippe wanted to be useful to the woman she served, not just in helping her dress or style her hair. She wanted to do everything for her, to ensure she was always happy. When she found an opportunity to do that, she was definitely going to take it.
She was practically falling over herself with joy as she walked inside with the two men, setting the carcass down on one of the long tables in the kitchen. A rare smile beamed from her face at the other two, thanking them profusely. The men nodded in acceptance, looking at her a little askance. How had she managed to kill and bag that thing on her own? Had she drug the beast on the horse’s back herself? Xanthippe was a strange member of the Leventi household, but given his lordship’s favor of her, the men declined to comment, simply bid her farewell and went their own way.
“Oh, she will be so pleased,” Xanthippe said to herself as took a wet cloth to the bloodied bits of her skin. Her chiton was dark enough to disguise the splotches that stained it, but she didn’t want her surprise immediately ruined when she went to fetch Melina. If she saw her skin dotted with blood, it would give it away, and they couldn’t have that!
Do you know what would have been a better gift?
What’s that?
The head of one of those Mikaelidas boys who dared to insult her.
Yes, it would have been a better gift, but a bit harder to obtain.
Figure it out.
Maybe one day.
Glancing down at herself, she thought she’d done a good enough job of cleaning herself off that her mistress wouldn’t immediately notice anything was amiss. With a quick nod, she left the kitchens, her heart fluttering with eager anticipation. Gods, she could just imagine how excited Melina would be! That look of delight on her face when she saw what Xan had done… oh, it was going to be perfect!
Stopping at the door of Melina’s bedroom, she knocked politely before peeking her inside with a grin. “My lady, are you in here?” Spotting her mistress off toward the side, she entered the room fully and approached Melina with an unusual bounce in her step. “Are you busy?” she asked, a plaintive hope on her face. “I got you something, but you have to come to the kitchens first. It’s a surprise!”
Had she been a dog, Xanthippe’s tail would have wagged, her face full of secretive excitement. “Come on!” she urged her, her smile widening. “Don’t you want to see?”
Melina was having a very lovely day. She had just gotten a new book about flowers. It had inspired the girl to try her hand at flower arranging. Normally Melina didn’t think she was good at things. Quite often she failed at everything she tried. And… she was failing at this too. But it was the first time she tried flower arranging. And unlike everything else Melina did, even if she failed she still had fun. Besides, she didn’t make it look too horrible. It was flowers. Even if Melina completely clashed different colors, they were flowers so they were lovely.
She hummed to herself, completely lost in her art, snipping pieces here and there when she heard a knock at her door. My lady, are you here? Melina’s eyes lifted from the flowers and over to Xanthippe. Her lips widened to a large smile. “Xan! Yes, I was just trying something new.”
I got you something, but you have to come to the kitchens first.
Oh, what did Xan get her? She shouldn’t have gotten her anything! It wasn’t Melina’s birthday, nor was she celebrating anything. Why did Xan get her something? Did Melina have to get her something in return? What would Xan like? A new chiton? She only ever saw Xan wear black chitons. That must be her favorite color. Maybe she could get her another new black one? Oh! No, even better! When Melina finally made her first flower arrangement she was proud of, she would give it to Xanthippe.
“A surprise? You shouldn’t have!” Melina said brightly as she put her cutting tools down and got up from where she was sitting. “I’m sure whatever it is I’ll love it! Thank you!”
Melina was curious why she had to go to the kitchens. Did Xan bake her something? Melina didn’t know Xan knew how to bake. Then again, Xan could do anything. She was basically the protagonist in every novel she ever read. Gods, Xan was better than those protagonists. Protagonists have flaws, and Xan was flawless.
Melina cheerily followed Xan to the kitchens. She seemed so excited. Her excitement was spreading to Melina. What could it be? Clearly Xan was incredibly proud of herself. Melina was sure that she would be proud too.
But then Melina entered the kitchens and saw a dead deer. Melina didn’t know if she wanted to scream or vomit. She had mentioned there was a lack of venison at dinner. She didn’t mean that she wanted a dead deer in front of her. She just wanted more venison served at dinner. She wanted it cooked, spiced and not bloody.
“You… You sho-You shouldn’t ha-ohhh…” Melina saw the blood and had grown ghostly white. Suddenly she saw the blackspots. They were clouding her vision quickly. Melina tried to fight them as hard as she could. She tried to breathe, she tried to stay awake. But the blood was too much for her. Melina’s eyes rolled up and she fell towards the ground.
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This character is currently a work in progress.
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Melina was having a very lovely day. She had just gotten a new book about flowers. It had inspired the girl to try her hand at flower arranging. Normally Melina didn’t think she was good at things. Quite often she failed at everything she tried. And… she was failing at this too. But it was the first time she tried flower arranging. And unlike everything else Melina did, even if she failed she still had fun. Besides, she didn’t make it look too horrible. It was flowers. Even if Melina completely clashed different colors, they were flowers so they were lovely.
She hummed to herself, completely lost in her art, snipping pieces here and there when she heard a knock at her door. My lady, are you here? Melina’s eyes lifted from the flowers and over to Xanthippe. Her lips widened to a large smile. “Xan! Yes, I was just trying something new.”
I got you something, but you have to come to the kitchens first.
Oh, what did Xan get her? She shouldn’t have gotten her anything! It wasn’t Melina’s birthday, nor was she celebrating anything. Why did Xan get her something? Did Melina have to get her something in return? What would Xan like? A new chiton? She only ever saw Xan wear black chitons. That must be her favorite color. Maybe she could get her another new black one? Oh! No, even better! When Melina finally made her first flower arrangement she was proud of, she would give it to Xanthippe.
“A surprise? You shouldn’t have!” Melina said brightly as she put her cutting tools down and got up from where she was sitting. “I’m sure whatever it is I’ll love it! Thank you!”
Melina was curious why she had to go to the kitchens. Did Xan bake her something? Melina didn’t know Xan knew how to bake. Then again, Xan could do anything. She was basically the protagonist in every novel she ever read. Gods, Xan was better than those protagonists. Protagonists have flaws, and Xan was flawless.
Melina cheerily followed Xan to the kitchens. She seemed so excited. Her excitement was spreading to Melina. What could it be? Clearly Xan was incredibly proud of herself. Melina was sure that she would be proud too.
But then Melina entered the kitchens and saw a dead deer. Melina didn’t know if she wanted to scream or vomit. She had mentioned there was a lack of venison at dinner. She didn’t mean that she wanted a dead deer in front of her. She just wanted more venison served at dinner. She wanted it cooked, spiced and not bloody.
“You… You sho-You shouldn’t ha-ohhh…” Melina saw the blood and had grown ghostly white. Suddenly she saw the blackspots. They were clouding her vision quickly. Melina tried to fight them as hard as she could. She tried to breathe, she tried to stay awake. But the blood was too much for her. Melina’s eyes rolled up and she fell towards the ground.
Melina was having a very lovely day. She had just gotten a new book about flowers. It had inspired the girl to try her hand at flower arranging. Normally Melina didn’t think she was good at things. Quite often she failed at everything she tried. And… she was failing at this too. But it was the first time she tried flower arranging. And unlike everything else Melina did, even if she failed she still had fun. Besides, she didn’t make it look too horrible. It was flowers. Even if Melina completely clashed different colors, they were flowers so they were lovely.
She hummed to herself, completely lost in her art, snipping pieces here and there when she heard a knock at her door. My lady, are you here? Melina’s eyes lifted from the flowers and over to Xanthippe. Her lips widened to a large smile. “Xan! Yes, I was just trying something new.”
I got you something, but you have to come to the kitchens first.
Oh, what did Xan get her? She shouldn’t have gotten her anything! It wasn’t Melina’s birthday, nor was she celebrating anything. Why did Xan get her something? Did Melina have to get her something in return? What would Xan like? A new chiton? She only ever saw Xan wear black chitons. That must be her favorite color. Maybe she could get her another new black one? Oh! No, even better! When Melina finally made her first flower arrangement she was proud of, she would give it to Xanthippe.
“A surprise? You shouldn’t have!” Melina said brightly as she put her cutting tools down and got up from where she was sitting. “I’m sure whatever it is I’ll love it! Thank you!”
Melina was curious why she had to go to the kitchens. Did Xan bake her something? Melina didn’t know Xan knew how to bake. Then again, Xan could do anything. She was basically the protagonist in every novel she ever read. Gods, Xan was better than those protagonists. Protagonists have flaws, and Xan was flawless.
Melina cheerily followed Xan to the kitchens. She seemed so excited. Her excitement was spreading to Melina. What could it be? Clearly Xan was incredibly proud of herself. Melina was sure that she would be proud too.
But then Melina entered the kitchens and saw a dead deer. Melina didn’t know if she wanted to scream or vomit. She had mentioned there was a lack of venison at dinner. She didn’t mean that she wanted a dead deer in front of her. She just wanted more venison served at dinner. She wanted it cooked, spiced and not bloody.
“You… You sho-You shouldn’t ha-ohhh…” Melina saw the blood and had grown ghostly white. Suddenly she saw the blackspots. They were clouding her vision quickly. Melina tried to fight them as hard as she could. She tried to breathe, she tried to stay awake. But the blood was too much for her. Melina’s eyes rolled up and she fell towards the ground.
Xanthippe felt like she was floating at her mistress’s side as they walked down the halls toward the kitchens, every now and then stealing an excited glance at her face. She looked to be full of eager anticipation, and that was good. That was just what she was hoping for. After all, who didn’t like gifts or surprises? A dozen times she almost spilled the secret in their short journey, the words lingering on the tip of her tongue, but she kept careful control of herself. No, it would be worth it when they walked into the kitchen and Melina saw what she did. She couldn’t say anything until then.
As soon as they were in the open-aired room, Xanthippe darted in front of her mistress so she could see the younger girl’s reaction. Expecting an overflow of joy, an exclamation of excitement, or at the very least, a smile, what she got instead had her crestfallen and horrified.
‘You… You sho-You shouldn’t ha-ohhh…’
Xan went nearly as pale as Melina as she ran back to her ladyship’s side, catching her before she could hit the floor. This wasn’t what she had expected, not at all! “Oh, my lady, no! I’m so sorry!!” What should she do?! Looking around in a mild panic, she got a better grip on Melina, hooking her elbows under her armpits and pulling her backwards until they were out of the kitchen and safely in a side parlor. Hauling her up and onto one of the klines littering the space, Xanthippe’s hands flew up to her own face once her mistress was settled where she wouldn’t just fall back off.
Now, what? What was it that made her faint? Was it the sight of a dead animal? Surely, she had seen that before, hadn’t she? There were many Taengean hunters, and she thought at least one or two of her cousins were even archers. Then again, Melina was a delicate soul and was often shielded from the grislier side of life. Or, maybe it was just the blood. Whatever it was, well, Xanthippe certainly knew not to try something like this again. What a mess!
“My lady, please wake up,” she said, lightly tapping the sides of her face in an attempt to bring her back to wakefulness. Worry suffused her face, biting her lip in indecision. Perhaps she ought to call for a physician, but how did she explain that this was all her fault? What if they thought she’d done it on purpose? No, she would try to wake her up on her own first, and if that didn’t work, well… she would face what happened then.
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This character is currently a work in progress.
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Xanthippe felt like she was floating at her mistress’s side as they walked down the halls toward the kitchens, every now and then stealing an excited glance at her face. She looked to be full of eager anticipation, and that was good. That was just what she was hoping for. After all, who didn’t like gifts or surprises? A dozen times she almost spilled the secret in their short journey, the words lingering on the tip of her tongue, but she kept careful control of herself. No, it would be worth it when they walked into the kitchen and Melina saw what she did. She couldn’t say anything until then.
As soon as they were in the open-aired room, Xanthippe darted in front of her mistress so she could see the younger girl’s reaction. Expecting an overflow of joy, an exclamation of excitement, or at the very least, a smile, what she got instead had her crestfallen and horrified.
‘You… You sho-You shouldn’t ha-ohhh…’
Xan went nearly as pale as Melina as she ran back to her ladyship’s side, catching her before she could hit the floor. This wasn’t what she had expected, not at all! “Oh, my lady, no! I’m so sorry!!” What should she do?! Looking around in a mild panic, she got a better grip on Melina, hooking her elbows under her armpits and pulling her backwards until they were out of the kitchen and safely in a side parlor. Hauling her up and onto one of the klines littering the space, Xanthippe’s hands flew up to her own face once her mistress was settled where she wouldn’t just fall back off.
Now, what? What was it that made her faint? Was it the sight of a dead animal? Surely, she had seen that before, hadn’t she? There were many Taengean hunters, and she thought at least one or two of her cousins were even archers. Then again, Melina was a delicate soul and was often shielded from the grislier side of life. Or, maybe it was just the blood. Whatever it was, well, Xanthippe certainly knew not to try something like this again. What a mess!
“My lady, please wake up,” she said, lightly tapping the sides of her face in an attempt to bring her back to wakefulness. Worry suffused her face, biting her lip in indecision. Perhaps she ought to call for a physician, but how did she explain that this was all her fault? What if they thought she’d done it on purpose? No, she would try to wake her up on her own first, and if that didn’t work, well… she would face what happened then.
Xanthippe felt like she was floating at her mistress’s side as they walked down the halls toward the kitchens, every now and then stealing an excited glance at her face. She looked to be full of eager anticipation, and that was good. That was just what she was hoping for. After all, who didn’t like gifts or surprises? A dozen times she almost spilled the secret in their short journey, the words lingering on the tip of her tongue, but she kept careful control of herself. No, it would be worth it when they walked into the kitchen and Melina saw what she did. She couldn’t say anything until then.
As soon as they were in the open-aired room, Xanthippe darted in front of her mistress so she could see the younger girl’s reaction. Expecting an overflow of joy, an exclamation of excitement, or at the very least, a smile, what she got instead had her crestfallen and horrified.
‘You… You sho-You shouldn’t ha-ohhh…’
Xan went nearly as pale as Melina as she ran back to her ladyship’s side, catching her before she could hit the floor. This wasn’t what she had expected, not at all! “Oh, my lady, no! I’m so sorry!!” What should she do?! Looking around in a mild panic, she got a better grip on Melina, hooking her elbows under her armpits and pulling her backwards until they were out of the kitchen and safely in a side parlor. Hauling her up and onto one of the klines littering the space, Xanthippe’s hands flew up to her own face once her mistress was settled where she wouldn’t just fall back off.
Now, what? What was it that made her faint? Was it the sight of a dead animal? Surely, she had seen that before, hadn’t she? There were many Taengean hunters, and she thought at least one or two of her cousins were even archers. Then again, Melina was a delicate soul and was often shielded from the grislier side of life. Or, maybe it was just the blood. Whatever it was, well, Xanthippe certainly knew not to try something like this again. What a mess!
“My lady, please wake up,” she said, lightly tapping the sides of her face in an attempt to bring her back to wakefulness. Worry suffused her face, biting her lip in indecision. Perhaps she ought to call for a physician, but how did she explain that this was all her fault? What if they thought she’d done it on purpose? No, she would try to wake her up on her own first, and if that didn’t work, well… she would face what happened then.
There was likely no noble lady outside the Dimitrou that would have welcomed the sight that Melina saw. A bloodied carcass was the last surprise she was expected. A new book perhaps, or a baked good, was far more likely in Melina’s mind. Not a fresh kill.
Melina, however, would not be able to hold this against Xanthippe. She had all the right intentions and just wanted to make Melina pleased. She had gone through all that trouble and likely could have accidentally injured herself, just to bring a smile to her lady’s face. Melina would be able to appreciate that- when she woke up.
The unfortunate part was that she was still knocked out cold, just from the sight of blood.
Why was blood such a horrifying thing? It was sticky and sinister and only came with pain. Blood was never a good thing. Only crazy maniacs liked the sight of it- and Melina was far from that. Melina could not associate one good memory with blood, not one. Thus her fainting spell wasn’t over the top, right? A fear of blood made sense- especially when it was coupled with such a terrifying memory such as that new stable hand and the young horse.
But Xanthippe likely did not know of Melina’s fear. She did not tell others of it- for fear of being made fun of. She wouldn’t want Xan to look at her with disappointment either. What would she think if Melina was such a coward that the mere sight of blood caused her to collapse? Would she be like the others- laughing at how imperfect she was? Would she be like her father, disappointed at how she was a constant failure? Would Xan shun her after today? For being… weak?
Xan was such a sweet woman, who had every quality that Melina wished for. She was beautiful, she was strong, she was intelligent, and she was kind. It was that kindness that Melina relied on most. Xan would not abandon Melina just because she was weak. Her heart was too large for that. She was too giving.
Right?
None of these insecurities mattered, for when her dark eyes slid open, and she was staring up at Xanthippe, confusion washed over her. The last few minutes were completely gone from her memory. She had remembered walking down to see a surprise, and then suddenly she was here. What had happened in between?
Melina could only guess.
“What happened?” She blinked up at Xan. Xan was biting her lip. Did she ever bite her lip? Was she nervous? Did Melina do something wrong? “I’m sorry, Xan.” Melina said automatically, assuming whatever happened was her fault. It typically was.
She tried to sit up and another wave of dizziness hit her. Her stomach felt ill. Slowly she began to remember what just happened. And when she realized, her eyes flashed back up to Xan. “Oh,” Her face had paled once more. The surprise it was… Gods, was it possible to cut meat from her diet?
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There was likely no noble lady outside the Dimitrou that would have welcomed the sight that Melina saw. A bloodied carcass was the last surprise she was expected. A new book perhaps, or a baked good, was far more likely in Melina’s mind. Not a fresh kill.
Melina, however, would not be able to hold this against Xanthippe. She had all the right intentions and just wanted to make Melina pleased. She had gone through all that trouble and likely could have accidentally injured herself, just to bring a smile to her lady’s face. Melina would be able to appreciate that- when she woke up.
The unfortunate part was that she was still knocked out cold, just from the sight of blood.
Why was blood such a horrifying thing? It was sticky and sinister and only came with pain. Blood was never a good thing. Only crazy maniacs liked the sight of it- and Melina was far from that. Melina could not associate one good memory with blood, not one. Thus her fainting spell wasn’t over the top, right? A fear of blood made sense- especially when it was coupled with such a terrifying memory such as that new stable hand and the young horse.
But Xanthippe likely did not know of Melina’s fear. She did not tell others of it- for fear of being made fun of. She wouldn’t want Xan to look at her with disappointment either. What would she think if Melina was such a coward that the mere sight of blood caused her to collapse? Would she be like the others- laughing at how imperfect she was? Would she be like her father, disappointed at how she was a constant failure? Would Xan shun her after today? For being… weak?
Xan was such a sweet woman, who had every quality that Melina wished for. She was beautiful, she was strong, she was intelligent, and she was kind. It was that kindness that Melina relied on most. Xan would not abandon Melina just because she was weak. Her heart was too large for that. She was too giving.
Right?
None of these insecurities mattered, for when her dark eyes slid open, and she was staring up at Xanthippe, confusion washed over her. The last few minutes were completely gone from her memory. She had remembered walking down to see a surprise, and then suddenly she was here. What had happened in between?
Melina could only guess.
“What happened?” She blinked up at Xan. Xan was biting her lip. Did she ever bite her lip? Was she nervous? Did Melina do something wrong? “I’m sorry, Xan.” Melina said automatically, assuming whatever happened was her fault. It typically was.
She tried to sit up and another wave of dizziness hit her. Her stomach felt ill. Slowly she began to remember what just happened. And when she realized, her eyes flashed back up to Xan. “Oh,” Her face had paled once more. The surprise it was… Gods, was it possible to cut meat from her diet?
There was likely no noble lady outside the Dimitrou that would have welcomed the sight that Melina saw. A bloodied carcass was the last surprise she was expected. A new book perhaps, or a baked good, was far more likely in Melina’s mind. Not a fresh kill.
Melina, however, would not be able to hold this against Xanthippe. She had all the right intentions and just wanted to make Melina pleased. She had gone through all that trouble and likely could have accidentally injured herself, just to bring a smile to her lady’s face. Melina would be able to appreciate that- when she woke up.
The unfortunate part was that she was still knocked out cold, just from the sight of blood.
Why was blood such a horrifying thing? It was sticky and sinister and only came with pain. Blood was never a good thing. Only crazy maniacs liked the sight of it- and Melina was far from that. Melina could not associate one good memory with blood, not one. Thus her fainting spell wasn’t over the top, right? A fear of blood made sense- especially when it was coupled with such a terrifying memory such as that new stable hand and the young horse.
But Xanthippe likely did not know of Melina’s fear. She did not tell others of it- for fear of being made fun of. She wouldn’t want Xan to look at her with disappointment either. What would she think if Melina was such a coward that the mere sight of blood caused her to collapse? Would she be like the others- laughing at how imperfect she was? Would she be like her father, disappointed at how she was a constant failure? Would Xan shun her after today? For being… weak?
Xan was such a sweet woman, who had every quality that Melina wished for. She was beautiful, she was strong, she was intelligent, and she was kind. It was that kindness that Melina relied on most. Xan would not abandon Melina just because she was weak. Her heart was too large for that. She was too giving.
Right?
None of these insecurities mattered, for when her dark eyes slid open, and she was staring up at Xanthippe, confusion washed over her. The last few minutes were completely gone from her memory. She had remembered walking down to see a surprise, and then suddenly she was here. What had happened in between?
Melina could only guess.
“What happened?” She blinked up at Xan. Xan was biting her lip. Did she ever bite her lip? Was she nervous? Did Melina do something wrong? “I’m sorry, Xan.” Melina said automatically, assuming whatever happened was her fault. It typically was.
She tried to sit up and another wave of dizziness hit her. Her stomach felt ill. Slowly she began to remember what just happened. And when she realized, her eyes flashed back up to Xan. “Oh,” Her face had paled once more. The surprise it was… Gods, was it possible to cut meat from her diet?
Xanthippe’s heart was in her throat as she looked down at Melina, the woman’s face cradled between her hands. What if she didn’t wake up? What if Lord Fotios and Lady Eirini found out that this was all her fault? Oh no, she couldn’t let that happen. She would have to run away, disappear into the wood. At least she could hunt and fish. Perhaps she could survive on her own for a time…
Before her thoughts went down too dark a path, Melina’s eyes were fluttering back open. Xanthippe released her breath in a whoosh, shoulders visibly sagging in relief. “Oh, thank the gods, my lady,” she murmured reverently. “I’m so sorry!”
You’re welcome.
Ignoring the snide tone of the voice in her head, she kept her focus on her mistress—a frown furrowing her brow when Melina echoed her apology. Why was she saying sorry? “My lady, no, you haven’t done anything,” the handmaid insisted, shaking her head. “Please don’t apologize.”
‘What happened?’
As Xanthippe opened her mouth to answer, briefly deliberating on how much of the truth she ought to tell her, lest it upset her all over again, the woman seemed to come back to her senses, the forgetful fog of unconsciousness visibly clearing with the paleness of the Leventi’s face. “Oh, no, you don’t,” Xan said, securing her grasp around Melina before she could faint again. “Stay with me, my lady, it’s all right.”
Her face was contrite as she took in the younger woman, a rare uncertainty resting on her features. “I’m so sorry,” she said again, pale cheeks flushed with shame. “I should have thought… I just thought you’d be excited, that’s all.” She shook her head again with a soft sigh. “I forget sometimes, not everyone gets excited by the same things. I’ll remember next time.”
Shifting her hold on Melina until she was certain she wouldn’t simply fall out again, her face retained the same concern, tinged with embarrassment. “Can I get you anything, my lady? Water, perhaps? Ought I to call the healer?” That was about the last thing she wanted to do; if a healer was called, surely he would tell the lord and lady of the house. And what then? Would they reprimand her? Would they laugh it off?
Of course, she didn’t want Melina to be sick or in pain, either, and if she was, would it not be better to call the physician? It was just a little faint, though. Some water, and she should be okay. Right?
Lord Fotios is a fool to trust you.
Stupid girl.
What an idiot.
I didn’t know.
What were you thinking?
I said I didn’t know!
For a moment, her hand lifted to cover her ear, remembering halfway there that it would do no good, and would only serve to unnecessarily arouse Melina’s curiosity. Casually, she let her hand fall back down to pat her charge’s shoulder. “I’m going to get you some water,” she decided, whether Melina agreed or not, carefully sliding her from her arms to fetch the decanter off a side table.
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Xanthippe’s heart was in her throat as she looked down at Melina, the woman’s face cradled between her hands. What if she didn’t wake up? What if Lord Fotios and Lady Eirini found out that this was all her fault? Oh no, she couldn’t let that happen. She would have to run away, disappear into the wood. At least she could hunt and fish. Perhaps she could survive on her own for a time…
Before her thoughts went down too dark a path, Melina’s eyes were fluttering back open. Xanthippe released her breath in a whoosh, shoulders visibly sagging in relief. “Oh, thank the gods, my lady,” she murmured reverently. “I’m so sorry!”
You’re welcome.
Ignoring the snide tone of the voice in her head, she kept her focus on her mistress—a frown furrowing her brow when Melina echoed her apology. Why was she saying sorry? “My lady, no, you haven’t done anything,” the handmaid insisted, shaking her head. “Please don’t apologize.”
‘What happened?’
As Xanthippe opened her mouth to answer, briefly deliberating on how much of the truth she ought to tell her, lest it upset her all over again, the woman seemed to come back to her senses, the forgetful fog of unconsciousness visibly clearing with the paleness of the Leventi’s face. “Oh, no, you don’t,” Xan said, securing her grasp around Melina before she could faint again. “Stay with me, my lady, it’s all right.”
Her face was contrite as she took in the younger woman, a rare uncertainty resting on her features. “I’m so sorry,” she said again, pale cheeks flushed with shame. “I should have thought… I just thought you’d be excited, that’s all.” She shook her head again with a soft sigh. “I forget sometimes, not everyone gets excited by the same things. I’ll remember next time.”
Shifting her hold on Melina until she was certain she wouldn’t simply fall out again, her face retained the same concern, tinged with embarrassment. “Can I get you anything, my lady? Water, perhaps? Ought I to call the healer?” That was about the last thing she wanted to do; if a healer was called, surely he would tell the lord and lady of the house. And what then? Would they reprimand her? Would they laugh it off?
Of course, she didn’t want Melina to be sick or in pain, either, and if she was, would it not be better to call the physician? It was just a little faint, though. Some water, and she should be okay. Right?
Lord Fotios is a fool to trust you.
Stupid girl.
What an idiot.
I didn’t know.
What were you thinking?
I said I didn’t know!
For a moment, her hand lifted to cover her ear, remembering halfway there that it would do no good, and would only serve to unnecessarily arouse Melina’s curiosity. Casually, she let her hand fall back down to pat her charge’s shoulder. “I’m going to get you some water,” she decided, whether Melina agreed or not, carefully sliding her from her arms to fetch the decanter off a side table.
Xanthippe’s heart was in her throat as she looked down at Melina, the woman’s face cradled between her hands. What if she didn’t wake up? What if Lord Fotios and Lady Eirini found out that this was all her fault? Oh no, she couldn’t let that happen. She would have to run away, disappear into the wood. At least she could hunt and fish. Perhaps she could survive on her own for a time…
Before her thoughts went down too dark a path, Melina’s eyes were fluttering back open. Xanthippe released her breath in a whoosh, shoulders visibly sagging in relief. “Oh, thank the gods, my lady,” she murmured reverently. “I’m so sorry!”
You’re welcome.
Ignoring the snide tone of the voice in her head, she kept her focus on her mistress—a frown furrowing her brow when Melina echoed her apology. Why was she saying sorry? “My lady, no, you haven’t done anything,” the handmaid insisted, shaking her head. “Please don’t apologize.”
‘What happened?’
As Xanthippe opened her mouth to answer, briefly deliberating on how much of the truth she ought to tell her, lest it upset her all over again, the woman seemed to come back to her senses, the forgetful fog of unconsciousness visibly clearing with the paleness of the Leventi’s face. “Oh, no, you don’t,” Xan said, securing her grasp around Melina before she could faint again. “Stay with me, my lady, it’s all right.”
Her face was contrite as she took in the younger woman, a rare uncertainty resting on her features. “I’m so sorry,” she said again, pale cheeks flushed with shame. “I should have thought… I just thought you’d be excited, that’s all.” She shook her head again with a soft sigh. “I forget sometimes, not everyone gets excited by the same things. I’ll remember next time.”
Shifting her hold on Melina until she was certain she wouldn’t simply fall out again, her face retained the same concern, tinged with embarrassment. “Can I get you anything, my lady? Water, perhaps? Ought I to call the healer?” That was about the last thing she wanted to do; if a healer was called, surely he would tell the lord and lady of the house. And what then? Would they reprimand her? Would they laugh it off?
Of course, she didn’t want Melina to be sick or in pain, either, and if she was, would it not be better to call the physician? It was just a little faint, though. Some water, and she should be okay. Right?
Lord Fotios is a fool to trust you.
Stupid girl.
What an idiot.
I didn’t know.
What were you thinking?
I said I didn’t know!
For a moment, her hand lifted to cover her ear, remembering halfway there that it would do no good, and would only serve to unnecessarily arouse Melina’s curiosity. Casually, she let her hand fall back down to pat her charge’s shoulder. “I’m going to get you some water,” she decided, whether Melina agreed or not, carefully sliding her from her arms to fetch the decanter off a side table.
Before Melina could react- Xan was gone. She felt awful. Xan was worried all because Melina was weak. If Melina weren’t like this if Melina was strong, she wouldn’t… she wouldn’t cause so much trouble.
Melina wanted to be more like the others. She wanted to be pretty like her cousins, strong like her eldest sister and mother, and confident like her father. Instead, she had a brain and nothing else. What good did that do her anyway? A woman with a brain was not nearly as useful as a woman with beauty, a woman with strength, or a woman who knew how to be ladylike.
Melina sighed, lamenting over her failures. She stood and went over to the window, waiting for Xan to return with her water. She’d just apologize and return to her room. Melina would work on a bouquet to brighten up Xan’s quarters out of gratitude and apologize. Hopefully, this incident would be forgotten. Hopefully.
“Huh, strange.” Melina noticed as she looked out the window. A man was approaching. He looked really upset. That was the gardener, wasn’t it? The one that mother was going to have fired that day? A bit behind him, there were guards, obviously running towards him. Melina didn’t know what was happening. But suddenly, the man had crouched and grabbed a rock from the ground. What was he doing?
Melina should have moved. The next thing she knew, the rock was being hurled towards the window she had been standing at. Crash! Melina managed to cover her face with her arm, but all around her, the glass shattered, pieces slicing into her flesh. The rock hit her with a thump.
Melina knew not to look. She knew this was not the place to faint again. She could feel the sticky red blood as it slid down her, but she squeezed her eyes shut. Instead, she focused on the pain. It hurt really, really bad. The pain, at least, wouldn’t be something that caused her to pass out.
Outside Melina could hear a string of expletives. The man shouted curses towards the Leventi house, as the guards started yanking him away. He was always a bit of a nutter. Melina didn’t much like the gardener, nor did her family. That was why he was fired. But she didn’t think he would throw a rock at their window. One that Melina was standing at too!
But that was just her luck, wasn’t it? The gods cursed her. He would throw a rock just as Melina was there.
“X-Xan!” Melina called out in her scared voice. She was surrounded by glass and was too afraid to open her eyes. If she saw blood, if she were weak, she would faint ontop of the glass. And everything hurt. There were shards in her arm and a rather large welt from where the rock slammed into her. “X-Xan!” Melina called out again. She didn’t know who else to turn to. She didn’t want just any servant to help her, nor did she want a guard. Who she needed was Xan.
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Before Melina could react- Xan was gone. She felt awful. Xan was worried all because Melina was weak. If Melina weren’t like this if Melina was strong, she wouldn’t… she wouldn’t cause so much trouble.
Melina wanted to be more like the others. She wanted to be pretty like her cousins, strong like her eldest sister and mother, and confident like her father. Instead, she had a brain and nothing else. What good did that do her anyway? A woman with a brain was not nearly as useful as a woman with beauty, a woman with strength, or a woman who knew how to be ladylike.
Melina sighed, lamenting over her failures. She stood and went over to the window, waiting for Xan to return with her water. She’d just apologize and return to her room. Melina would work on a bouquet to brighten up Xan’s quarters out of gratitude and apologize. Hopefully, this incident would be forgotten. Hopefully.
“Huh, strange.” Melina noticed as she looked out the window. A man was approaching. He looked really upset. That was the gardener, wasn’t it? The one that mother was going to have fired that day? A bit behind him, there were guards, obviously running towards him. Melina didn’t know what was happening. But suddenly, the man had crouched and grabbed a rock from the ground. What was he doing?
Melina should have moved. The next thing she knew, the rock was being hurled towards the window she had been standing at. Crash! Melina managed to cover her face with her arm, but all around her, the glass shattered, pieces slicing into her flesh. The rock hit her with a thump.
Melina knew not to look. She knew this was not the place to faint again. She could feel the sticky red blood as it slid down her, but she squeezed her eyes shut. Instead, she focused on the pain. It hurt really, really bad. The pain, at least, wouldn’t be something that caused her to pass out.
Outside Melina could hear a string of expletives. The man shouted curses towards the Leventi house, as the guards started yanking him away. He was always a bit of a nutter. Melina didn’t much like the gardener, nor did her family. That was why he was fired. But she didn’t think he would throw a rock at their window. One that Melina was standing at too!
But that was just her luck, wasn’t it? The gods cursed her. He would throw a rock just as Melina was there.
“X-Xan!” Melina called out in her scared voice. She was surrounded by glass and was too afraid to open her eyes. If she saw blood, if she were weak, she would faint ontop of the glass. And everything hurt. There were shards in her arm and a rather large welt from where the rock slammed into her. “X-Xan!” Melina called out again. She didn’t know who else to turn to. She didn’t want just any servant to help her, nor did she want a guard. Who she needed was Xan.
Before Melina could react- Xan was gone. She felt awful. Xan was worried all because Melina was weak. If Melina weren’t like this if Melina was strong, she wouldn’t… she wouldn’t cause so much trouble.
Melina wanted to be more like the others. She wanted to be pretty like her cousins, strong like her eldest sister and mother, and confident like her father. Instead, she had a brain and nothing else. What good did that do her anyway? A woman with a brain was not nearly as useful as a woman with beauty, a woman with strength, or a woman who knew how to be ladylike.
Melina sighed, lamenting over her failures. She stood and went over to the window, waiting for Xan to return with her water. She’d just apologize and return to her room. Melina would work on a bouquet to brighten up Xan’s quarters out of gratitude and apologize. Hopefully, this incident would be forgotten. Hopefully.
“Huh, strange.” Melina noticed as she looked out the window. A man was approaching. He looked really upset. That was the gardener, wasn’t it? The one that mother was going to have fired that day? A bit behind him, there were guards, obviously running towards him. Melina didn’t know what was happening. But suddenly, the man had crouched and grabbed a rock from the ground. What was he doing?
Melina should have moved. The next thing she knew, the rock was being hurled towards the window she had been standing at. Crash! Melina managed to cover her face with her arm, but all around her, the glass shattered, pieces slicing into her flesh. The rock hit her with a thump.
Melina knew not to look. She knew this was not the place to faint again. She could feel the sticky red blood as it slid down her, but she squeezed her eyes shut. Instead, she focused on the pain. It hurt really, really bad. The pain, at least, wouldn’t be something that caused her to pass out.
Outside Melina could hear a string of expletives. The man shouted curses towards the Leventi house, as the guards started yanking him away. He was always a bit of a nutter. Melina didn’t much like the gardener, nor did her family. That was why he was fired. But she didn’t think he would throw a rock at their window. One that Melina was standing at too!
But that was just her luck, wasn’t it? The gods cursed her. He would throw a rock just as Melina was there.
“X-Xan!” Melina called out in her scared voice. She was surrounded by glass and was too afraid to open her eyes. If she saw blood, if she were weak, she would faint ontop of the glass. And everything hurt. There were shards in her arm and a rather large welt from where the rock slammed into her. “X-Xan!” Melina called out again. She didn’t know who else to turn to. She didn’t want just any servant to help her, nor did she want a guard. Who she needed was Xan.
It all happened so quickly, too fast for Xanthippe to stop it. Holding the glass of water she had fetched from a nearby jug, the handmaid strayed toward her mistress, but it was already too late. A shouting man was heading toward the window, a frown between her brows as she turned to look, and before she knew it, Melina was on her feet and far too close. “My lady, look out!” she cried, but it didn’t matter. A rock shattering glass, louder shouting, and fresh blood. Gods, what a day this was turning out to be.
You can’t blame us for this one.
Can’t I, though?
We do not control all men.
Could have fooled me.
Her vision flashed red as she surged forward, intending to leap through the now shattered window and grab the perpetrator by the throat. What was this fool thinking?! No, he would pay for this. No one harmed Melina and got away with it, not while she was around. She was just about to climb through the damaged pane when she saw the guards take hold of him and start dragging him off, but that was when she heard Melina’s frightened voice. Though the others seemed to have the situation well in hand, she would have gone anyway and taught this wretch a real lesson, had it not been for her mistress’s terrified plea.
She couldn’t turn her away, not when she sounded like that. Though she raged at the man who had caused the injury, she had to attend her mistress’s safety before she could do anything about him. It shouldn’t be too hard to find out where he was kept, anyway. There would be time enough for punishments later.
“I’m here, my lady,” she said in a gruff voice as she altered her path toward Melina instead. “Keep your eyes closed,” she cautioned as she took hold of the woman’s hands and slowly lowered her arms. If the sight of the deer’s blood had caused her to faint, Xanthippe didn’t want to think of what the sight of her own blood might do. Her lip curled in distaste as she saw the bits of glass stuck into her flesh and shook her head with a growl. Oh, how this animal would pay.
Two wounds for every one on her.
I’ll do better than that.
“We will need a physician to attend this,” she said as she eyed the glass shards, her lip curling in a moue of distaste. “I do not know that I can pick the glass out without harming you further.” Which wouldn’t normally concern her, but she could not harm Melina. “Come, sit back down.”
Xan carefully led her charge back over to the kline where she had rested her before, helping her sit and gently patting her shoulder. “Wait here, my lady. I’ll go fetch the healer.”
Sighing, she shook her head as she eyed the blood dripping from Melina’s arms and onto the kline below. They’d have to get rid of it, she thought as she turned to hurry down the hall. No way were they getting those stains out.
It didn’t take her long to find the old physician, a man well into the twilight of his life but still going strong despite the odds against him. She quickly explained what happened, and he was surprisingly spry as he followed her back to the parlor where she left the middle Leventi daughter.
Gesturing for the man to precede her, he greeted Melina with a bow before kneeling down in front of her. ‘We’ll get you all fixed up, my lady, never you fear,’ he assured her with a pat to her knee, carefully taking one of her arms and turning it to inspect the damage. ‘None of the shards look too deep, so that’s good. You might not even scar.’
The handmaid bit her lip as she stood back and watched the man tend to Melina, a sick feeling resting in the pit of her stomach. She was sure to be blamed for this, she just knew it. And this was her fault—Melina had passed out because of the deer Xan brought, and then she hadn’t even been able to stop that lunatic from hurting her. Perhaps Lord Fotios would find her an unworthy retainer, after all, and put her on kitchen duty instead.
Gods, this was bad. This was so bad. Why hadn’t she stopped it?!
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It all happened so quickly, too fast for Xanthippe to stop it. Holding the glass of water she had fetched from a nearby jug, the handmaid strayed toward her mistress, but it was already too late. A shouting man was heading toward the window, a frown between her brows as she turned to look, and before she knew it, Melina was on her feet and far too close. “My lady, look out!” she cried, but it didn’t matter. A rock shattering glass, louder shouting, and fresh blood. Gods, what a day this was turning out to be.
You can’t blame us for this one.
Can’t I, though?
We do not control all men.
Could have fooled me.
Her vision flashed red as she surged forward, intending to leap through the now shattered window and grab the perpetrator by the throat. What was this fool thinking?! No, he would pay for this. No one harmed Melina and got away with it, not while she was around. She was just about to climb through the damaged pane when she saw the guards take hold of him and start dragging him off, but that was when she heard Melina’s frightened voice. Though the others seemed to have the situation well in hand, she would have gone anyway and taught this wretch a real lesson, had it not been for her mistress’s terrified plea.
She couldn’t turn her away, not when she sounded like that. Though she raged at the man who had caused the injury, she had to attend her mistress’s safety before she could do anything about him. It shouldn’t be too hard to find out where he was kept, anyway. There would be time enough for punishments later.
“I’m here, my lady,” she said in a gruff voice as she altered her path toward Melina instead. “Keep your eyes closed,” she cautioned as she took hold of the woman’s hands and slowly lowered her arms. If the sight of the deer’s blood had caused her to faint, Xanthippe didn’t want to think of what the sight of her own blood might do. Her lip curled in distaste as she saw the bits of glass stuck into her flesh and shook her head with a growl. Oh, how this animal would pay.
Two wounds for every one on her.
I’ll do better than that.
“We will need a physician to attend this,” she said as she eyed the glass shards, her lip curling in a moue of distaste. “I do not know that I can pick the glass out without harming you further.” Which wouldn’t normally concern her, but she could not harm Melina. “Come, sit back down.”
Xan carefully led her charge back over to the kline where she had rested her before, helping her sit and gently patting her shoulder. “Wait here, my lady. I’ll go fetch the healer.”
Sighing, she shook her head as she eyed the blood dripping from Melina’s arms and onto the kline below. They’d have to get rid of it, she thought as she turned to hurry down the hall. No way were they getting those stains out.
It didn’t take her long to find the old physician, a man well into the twilight of his life but still going strong despite the odds against him. She quickly explained what happened, and he was surprisingly spry as he followed her back to the parlor where she left the middle Leventi daughter.
Gesturing for the man to precede her, he greeted Melina with a bow before kneeling down in front of her. ‘We’ll get you all fixed up, my lady, never you fear,’ he assured her with a pat to her knee, carefully taking one of her arms and turning it to inspect the damage. ‘None of the shards look too deep, so that’s good. You might not even scar.’
The handmaid bit her lip as she stood back and watched the man tend to Melina, a sick feeling resting in the pit of her stomach. She was sure to be blamed for this, she just knew it. And this was her fault—Melina had passed out because of the deer Xan brought, and then she hadn’t even been able to stop that lunatic from hurting her. Perhaps Lord Fotios would find her an unworthy retainer, after all, and put her on kitchen duty instead.
Gods, this was bad. This was so bad. Why hadn’t she stopped it?!
It all happened so quickly, too fast for Xanthippe to stop it. Holding the glass of water she had fetched from a nearby jug, the handmaid strayed toward her mistress, but it was already too late. A shouting man was heading toward the window, a frown between her brows as she turned to look, and before she knew it, Melina was on her feet and far too close. “My lady, look out!” she cried, but it didn’t matter. A rock shattering glass, louder shouting, and fresh blood. Gods, what a day this was turning out to be.
You can’t blame us for this one.
Can’t I, though?
We do not control all men.
Could have fooled me.
Her vision flashed red as she surged forward, intending to leap through the now shattered window and grab the perpetrator by the throat. What was this fool thinking?! No, he would pay for this. No one harmed Melina and got away with it, not while she was around. She was just about to climb through the damaged pane when she saw the guards take hold of him and start dragging him off, but that was when she heard Melina’s frightened voice. Though the others seemed to have the situation well in hand, she would have gone anyway and taught this wretch a real lesson, had it not been for her mistress’s terrified plea.
She couldn’t turn her away, not when she sounded like that. Though she raged at the man who had caused the injury, she had to attend her mistress’s safety before she could do anything about him. It shouldn’t be too hard to find out where he was kept, anyway. There would be time enough for punishments later.
“I’m here, my lady,” she said in a gruff voice as she altered her path toward Melina instead. “Keep your eyes closed,” she cautioned as she took hold of the woman’s hands and slowly lowered her arms. If the sight of the deer’s blood had caused her to faint, Xanthippe didn’t want to think of what the sight of her own blood might do. Her lip curled in distaste as she saw the bits of glass stuck into her flesh and shook her head with a growl. Oh, how this animal would pay.
Two wounds for every one on her.
I’ll do better than that.
“We will need a physician to attend this,” she said as she eyed the glass shards, her lip curling in a moue of distaste. “I do not know that I can pick the glass out without harming you further.” Which wouldn’t normally concern her, but she could not harm Melina. “Come, sit back down.”
Xan carefully led her charge back over to the kline where she had rested her before, helping her sit and gently patting her shoulder. “Wait here, my lady. I’ll go fetch the healer.”
Sighing, she shook her head as she eyed the blood dripping from Melina’s arms and onto the kline below. They’d have to get rid of it, she thought as she turned to hurry down the hall. No way were they getting those stains out.
It didn’t take her long to find the old physician, a man well into the twilight of his life but still going strong despite the odds against him. She quickly explained what happened, and he was surprisingly spry as he followed her back to the parlor where she left the middle Leventi daughter.
Gesturing for the man to precede her, he greeted Melina with a bow before kneeling down in front of her. ‘We’ll get you all fixed up, my lady, never you fear,’ he assured her with a pat to her knee, carefully taking one of her arms and turning it to inspect the damage. ‘None of the shards look too deep, so that’s good. You might not even scar.’
The handmaid bit her lip as she stood back and watched the man tend to Melina, a sick feeling resting in the pit of her stomach. She was sure to be blamed for this, she just knew it. And this was her fault—Melina had passed out because of the deer Xan brought, and then she hadn’t even been able to stop that lunatic from hurting her. Perhaps Lord Fotios would find her an unworthy retainer, after all, and put her on kitchen duty instead.
Gods, this was bad. This was so bad. Why hadn’t she stopped it?!
Melina blindly followed Xan’s lead. Her heart was pounding. In part, Melina was angry. Why would someone throw a rock at a window that had someone standing there? She didn’t care how angry the person was, that’s not something you do! She was scared. That could have been awful. If she had been standing a few inches to the left, the shards of glass could have hit her throat or her gut. And… she felt bad.
Wait here, my lady. I’ll go fetch the healer. And then she heard it. It was soft… but it was there. Xan sighed.
As she heard her footsteps fade away, presumably to get the healer, Melina allowed her lip to wobble. Xan was probably very annoyed with Melina. All she wanted to do was surprise her, and then Melina caused a big mess. That wasn’t fair to Xan. She was doing a good thing and now she had to deal with everything. What if she hated Melina after this? She wouldn’t blame her. She was cowardly and careless. She couldn’t even move fast enough to avoid a rock.
Melina felt tears start to sting her eyes, but not because of the pain or the obvious blood she could feel dripping from her arm and down her fingertips. And even as the elderly healer slowly and methodically removed the glass from her flesh, it wasn’t the pain that caused the tears to quietly slide down her cheeks. It was the thought that Xan was upset at her. That was the worst feeling in the whole wide world. She’d rather be passed out on a mound of glass than have Xan, her closest friend, upset.
It was only when he added a balm and bandaged her arm, with strict instructions to see him twice daily to clean the wounds, did Melina finally open her eyes. She didn’t look at the bandages which were probably stained red or pink with her blood. She stared at the floor, away from the two of them. She couldn’t get herself to look at Xan. She didn’t want to see the disappointment.
“I’m sorry, Xan,” Melina said so quietly that it was nearly inaudible. She tried again, a little louder. “I’m sorry, Xan.” That was a little better. She wanted to look up at her, so she could see the sincerity in Melina’s eyes. Her hand brushed away the tears, but they kept coming, one after the other. They cascaded down her cheeks, living little rivers in their wake.
“This isn’t fair to you. All you wanted was to surprise me. You were doing a good thing and I went and ruined it all, didn’t I? I shouldn’t have fainted. And I should have been fast enough to dodge that rock. This isn’t fair to you, having to deal with all of this. You already do too much, Xan. I should be better.” But Melina wasn’t. She was so flawed that the only redeeming quality about her was that she was born to a powerful family. And even that carried its burdens. “You have every right to be upset with me. I’ve ruined everything.”
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Melina blindly followed Xan’s lead. Her heart was pounding. In part, Melina was angry. Why would someone throw a rock at a window that had someone standing there? She didn’t care how angry the person was, that’s not something you do! She was scared. That could have been awful. If she had been standing a few inches to the left, the shards of glass could have hit her throat or her gut. And… she felt bad.
Wait here, my lady. I’ll go fetch the healer. And then she heard it. It was soft… but it was there. Xan sighed.
As she heard her footsteps fade away, presumably to get the healer, Melina allowed her lip to wobble. Xan was probably very annoyed with Melina. All she wanted to do was surprise her, and then Melina caused a big mess. That wasn’t fair to Xan. She was doing a good thing and now she had to deal with everything. What if she hated Melina after this? She wouldn’t blame her. She was cowardly and careless. She couldn’t even move fast enough to avoid a rock.
Melina felt tears start to sting her eyes, but not because of the pain or the obvious blood she could feel dripping from her arm and down her fingertips. And even as the elderly healer slowly and methodically removed the glass from her flesh, it wasn’t the pain that caused the tears to quietly slide down her cheeks. It was the thought that Xan was upset at her. That was the worst feeling in the whole wide world. She’d rather be passed out on a mound of glass than have Xan, her closest friend, upset.
It was only when he added a balm and bandaged her arm, with strict instructions to see him twice daily to clean the wounds, did Melina finally open her eyes. She didn’t look at the bandages which were probably stained red or pink with her blood. She stared at the floor, away from the two of them. She couldn’t get herself to look at Xan. She didn’t want to see the disappointment.
“I’m sorry, Xan,” Melina said so quietly that it was nearly inaudible. She tried again, a little louder. “I’m sorry, Xan.” That was a little better. She wanted to look up at her, so she could see the sincerity in Melina’s eyes. Her hand brushed away the tears, but they kept coming, one after the other. They cascaded down her cheeks, living little rivers in their wake.
“This isn’t fair to you. All you wanted was to surprise me. You were doing a good thing and I went and ruined it all, didn’t I? I shouldn’t have fainted. And I should have been fast enough to dodge that rock. This isn’t fair to you, having to deal with all of this. You already do too much, Xan. I should be better.” But Melina wasn’t. She was so flawed that the only redeeming quality about her was that she was born to a powerful family. And even that carried its burdens. “You have every right to be upset with me. I’ve ruined everything.”
Melina blindly followed Xan’s lead. Her heart was pounding. In part, Melina was angry. Why would someone throw a rock at a window that had someone standing there? She didn’t care how angry the person was, that’s not something you do! She was scared. That could have been awful. If she had been standing a few inches to the left, the shards of glass could have hit her throat or her gut. And… she felt bad.
Wait here, my lady. I’ll go fetch the healer. And then she heard it. It was soft… but it was there. Xan sighed.
As she heard her footsteps fade away, presumably to get the healer, Melina allowed her lip to wobble. Xan was probably very annoyed with Melina. All she wanted to do was surprise her, and then Melina caused a big mess. That wasn’t fair to Xan. She was doing a good thing and now she had to deal with everything. What if she hated Melina after this? She wouldn’t blame her. She was cowardly and careless. She couldn’t even move fast enough to avoid a rock.
Melina felt tears start to sting her eyes, but not because of the pain or the obvious blood she could feel dripping from her arm and down her fingertips. And even as the elderly healer slowly and methodically removed the glass from her flesh, it wasn’t the pain that caused the tears to quietly slide down her cheeks. It was the thought that Xan was upset at her. That was the worst feeling in the whole wide world. She’d rather be passed out on a mound of glass than have Xan, her closest friend, upset.
It was only when he added a balm and bandaged her arm, with strict instructions to see him twice daily to clean the wounds, did Melina finally open her eyes. She didn’t look at the bandages which were probably stained red or pink with her blood. She stared at the floor, away from the two of them. She couldn’t get herself to look at Xan. She didn’t want to see the disappointment.
“I’m sorry, Xan,” Melina said so quietly that it was nearly inaudible. She tried again, a little louder. “I’m sorry, Xan.” That was a little better. She wanted to look up at her, so she could see the sincerity in Melina’s eyes. Her hand brushed away the tears, but they kept coming, one after the other. They cascaded down her cheeks, living little rivers in their wake.
“This isn’t fair to you. All you wanted was to surprise me. You were doing a good thing and I went and ruined it all, didn’t I? I shouldn’t have fainted. And I should have been fast enough to dodge that rock. This isn’t fair to you, having to deal with all of this. You already do too much, Xan. I should be better.” But Melina wasn’t. She was so flawed that the only redeeming quality about her was that she was born to a powerful family. And even that carried its burdens. “You have every right to be upset with me. I’ve ruined everything.”
Xanthippe waited with a clenched jaw as the elderly man tended to Melina, fighting the urge to pace the room. What was taking him so long? What if something was really wrong? Had the glass nicked a big vein? Would she need to be stitched? What if she fainted again… or worse? This was all her fault. Melina might die, and it was all her fault.
What a stupid girl you are.
I know. I’m not worthy of her.
You are not, it’s true.
Hush, don’t you think she feels bad enough? It’s not your fault, Xanthippe.
She ought to feel bad. It isher fault.
No. She could not have prevented this.
Yes, I could have.
Fotios will have your head.
And I would deserve it.
Her jaw clenched even harder as she fought to block the voices out, watching as the physician finally left the room. He was probably heading off to tell Lord Fotios now. This was it… this was the end. Lord Fotios would know Xanthippe was responsible for his daughter’s injury, and she would be dismissed from his service. Rushing back to her mistress’s side, she knelt on the ground in front of the kline, opening her mouth and readying herself to spew apologies and professions of guilt. Before she could say a word, however, Melina was looking at her with teary eyes and expressing how all of this was her fault.
Xan’s mouth snapped shut with a frown. How could she even think that? Melina hadn’t done anything. This was all Xan’s fault. “No, my lady,” she protested against the woman’s apologies and self-remonstration. “No, you should not be sorry. You haven’t ruined anything at all.”
She took Melina’s hands, and while part of her ached that the woman should blame herself, another part of her was relieved that perhaps the blame would not fall on her, after all. “I’m not upset with you, not in the least bit. I’m upset with myself, that I was so thoughtless, that I brought you a gift that made you faint.” A mistake she would not make a second time, that was for sure. “And I’m upset with the man that hurt you. I should have seen him coming and got you out of the way.”
There was a dark bitterness in her tone at those last words, a hardness settling over her features. That man would pay, she could promise that. He would pay more severely than whatever punishment the guards might have in store for him—she would see to it personally. He was not going to get away with this.
Forcing her face to soften, Xanthippe gazed back up at Melina. “Please don’t blame yourself, my lady. If anything, you should be blaming me. I could have prevented all of this if I had been just a little smarter.”
She made herself smile, hoping it would mirror the expression on her beloved lady’s face. “It’s fine, all right? You do not need to be better. You’re already perfect the way you are.”
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Xanthippe waited with a clenched jaw as the elderly man tended to Melina, fighting the urge to pace the room. What was taking him so long? What if something was really wrong? Had the glass nicked a big vein? Would she need to be stitched? What if she fainted again… or worse? This was all her fault. Melina might die, and it was all her fault.
What a stupid girl you are.
I know. I’m not worthy of her.
You are not, it’s true.
Hush, don’t you think she feels bad enough? It’s not your fault, Xanthippe.
She ought to feel bad. It isher fault.
No. She could not have prevented this.
Yes, I could have.
Fotios will have your head.
And I would deserve it.
Her jaw clenched even harder as she fought to block the voices out, watching as the physician finally left the room. He was probably heading off to tell Lord Fotios now. This was it… this was the end. Lord Fotios would know Xanthippe was responsible for his daughter’s injury, and she would be dismissed from his service. Rushing back to her mistress’s side, she knelt on the ground in front of the kline, opening her mouth and readying herself to spew apologies and professions of guilt. Before she could say a word, however, Melina was looking at her with teary eyes and expressing how all of this was her fault.
Xan’s mouth snapped shut with a frown. How could she even think that? Melina hadn’t done anything. This was all Xan’s fault. “No, my lady,” she protested against the woman’s apologies and self-remonstration. “No, you should not be sorry. You haven’t ruined anything at all.”
She took Melina’s hands, and while part of her ached that the woman should blame herself, another part of her was relieved that perhaps the blame would not fall on her, after all. “I’m not upset with you, not in the least bit. I’m upset with myself, that I was so thoughtless, that I brought you a gift that made you faint.” A mistake she would not make a second time, that was for sure. “And I’m upset with the man that hurt you. I should have seen him coming and got you out of the way.”
There was a dark bitterness in her tone at those last words, a hardness settling over her features. That man would pay, she could promise that. He would pay more severely than whatever punishment the guards might have in store for him—she would see to it personally. He was not going to get away with this.
Forcing her face to soften, Xanthippe gazed back up at Melina. “Please don’t blame yourself, my lady. If anything, you should be blaming me. I could have prevented all of this if I had been just a little smarter.”
She made herself smile, hoping it would mirror the expression on her beloved lady’s face. “It’s fine, all right? You do not need to be better. You’re already perfect the way you are.”
Xanthippe waited with a clenched jaw as the elderly man tended to Melina, fighting the urge to pace the room. What was taking him so long? What if something was really wrong? Had the glass nicked a big vein? Would she need to be stitched? What if she fainted again… or worse? This was all her fault. Melina might die, and it was all her fault.
What a stupid girl you are.
I know. I’m not worthy of her.
You are not, it’s true.
Hush, don’t you think she feels bad enough? It’s not your fault, Xanthippe.
She ought to feel bad. It isher fault.
No. She could not have prevented this.
Yes, I could have.
Fotios will have your head.
And I would deserve it.
Her jaw clenched even harder as she fought to block the voices out, watching as the physician finally left the room. He was probably heading off to tell Lord Fotios now. This was it… this was the end. Lord Fotios would know Xanthippe was responsible for his daughter’s injury, and she would be dismissed from his service. Rushing back to her mistress’s side, she knelt on the ground in front of the kline, opening her mouth and readying herself to spew apologies and professions of guilt. Before she could say a word, however, Melina was looking at her with teary eyes and expressing how all of this was her fault.
Xan’s mouth snapped shut with a frown. How could she even think that? Melina hadn’t done anything. This was all Xan’s fault. “No, my lady,” she protested against the woman’s apologies and self-remonstration. “No, you should not be sorry. You haven’t ruined anything at all.”
She took Melina’s hands, and while part of her ached that the woman should blame herself, another part of her was relieved that perhaps the blame would not fall on her, after all. “I’m not upset with you, not in the least bit. I’m upset with myself, that I was so thoughtless, that I brought you a gift that made you faint.” A mistake she would not make a second time, that was for sure. “And I’m upset with the man that hurt you. I should have seen him coming and got you out of the way.”
There was a dark bitterness in her tone at those last words, a hardness settling over her features. That man would pay, she could promise that. He would pay more severely than whatever punishment the guards might have in store for him—she would see to it personally. He was not going to get away with this.
Forcing her face to soften, Xanthippe gazed back up at Melina. “Please don’t blame yourself, my lady. If anything, you should be blaming me. I could have prevented all of this if I had been just a little smarter.”
She made herself smile, hoping it would mirror the expression on her beloved lady’s face. “It’s fine, all right? You do not need to be better. You’re already perfect the way you are.”
You’re already perfect the way you are. Melina felt her heart squeeze. It wasn’t true, she knew, but the words still felt nice to hear. Melina wished her parents, either parent, would tell her that. That’s all she wanted since she was such a small child. It wasn’t quite the same hearing it from Xanthippe- but there was still a warmness to it. Melina truly wanted to believe her when she said that. She wanted to be perfect the way she was.
When she had taken Melina’s hands finally she lifted her tear-filled gaze to Xan. She spoke with such honesty, such sincerity that Melina truly felt that even if she didn’t agree with her handmaiden… Xan truly believed every word she was saying. And that hurt Melina more- for Xan was not at fault here. Xan was the perfect one in every way.
“The gift was amazing, Xan and I truly appreciate it,” Melina said, squeezing her hand maiden’s hands. “I… I’m not used to someone listening to me like you do. Most people just hear my words and only get the surface level. But you went out of your way to do something just because it’d make me happy. And I hadn’t even been speaking to you when I mentioned venison. You heard it and thought to surprise me and I’m touched beyond words. Xan, you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I wish more people were as thoughtful as you. You made me so happy, getting me something I hadn’t even asked for. It shows just how much you know me. And… And…”
Melina hesitated. “The man acted too fast. You hadn’t expected me to be by the window, we didn’t expect that man to be there to… to throw the rock. But you saved me from that pool of glass, you got the healer, you did everything right Xan. There’s no reason to be upset with yourself. If it wasn’t for you… if it wasn’t for you then I…” wouldn’t be here right now? Would be drowning in a sea of misery? “Wouldn’t have anything.” Was it sad, really, that Melina could have anything she wanted with her father’s money, but it was Xan that actually made Melina happy. She could have every book, every flower, every jewel, anything, but without Xanthippe Melina wouldn’t be sure how to… function.
Melina dropped her friend’s hand and wiped her tears again. This was all so much. All for a surprise, and now Melina felt like she was bearing her soul and having thought that were far too dark and emotional for a woman her age. Thoughts that she hadn’t even put in her diary- thoughts that she had buried so deep down that they were now suddenly bubbling up and she didn’t know how to handle them. “Xan, you’re not allowed to blame yourself anymore okay? I’ll get really mad. I’ll be furious. You save me every day just by making me happy. And you make me happy just by being my friend. So if I ever hear you say it’s your fault again I’ll yell.” And Melina has never yelled at Xan. “Promise you won't?”
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You’re already perfect the way you are. Melina felt her heart squeeze. It wasn’t true, she knew, but the words still felt nice to hear. Melina wished her parents, either parent, would tell her that. That’s all she wanted since she was such a small child. It wasn’t quite the same hearing it from Xanthippe- but there was still a warmness to it. Melina truly wanted to believe her when she said that. She wanted to be perfect the way she was.
When she had taken Melina’s hands finally she lifted her tear-filled gaze to Xan. She spoke with such honesty, such sincerity that Melina truly felt that even if she didn’t agree with her handmaiden… Xan truly believed every word she was saying. And that hurt Melina more- for Xan was not at fault here. Xan was the perfect one in every way.
“The gift was amazing, Xan and I truly appreciate it,” Melina said, squeezing her hand maiden’s hands. “I… I’m not used to someone listening to me like you do. Most people just hear my words and only get the surface level. But you went out of your way to do something just because it’d make me happy. And I hadn’t even been speaking to you when I mentioned venison. You heard it and thought to surprise me and I’m touched beyond words. Xan, you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I wish more people were as thoughtful as you. You made me so happy, getting me something I hadn’t even asked for. It shows just how much you know me. And… And…”
Melina hesitated. “The man acted too fast. You hadn’t expected me to be by the window, we didn’t expect that man to be there to… to throw the rock. But you saved me from that pool of glass, you got the healer, you did everything right Xan. There’s no reason to be upset with yourself. If it wasn’t for you… if it wasn’t for you then I…” wouldn’t be here right now? Would be drowning in a sea of misery? “Wouldn’t have anything.” Was it sad, really, that Melina could have anything she wanted with her father’s money, but it was Xan that actually made Melina happy. She could have every book, every flower, every jewel, anything, but without Xanthippe Melina wouldn’t be sure how to… function.
Melina dropped her friend’s hand and wiped her tears again. This was all so much. All for a surprise, and now Melina felt like she was bearing her soul and having thought that were far too dark and emotional for a woman her age. Thoughts that she hadn’t even put in her diary- thoughts that she had buried so deep down that they were now suddenly bubbling up and she didn’t know how to handle them. “Xan, you’re not allowed to blame yourself anymore okay? I’ll get really mad. I’ll be furious. You save me every day just by making me happy. And you make me happy just by being my friend. So if I ever hear you say it’s your fault again I’ll yell.” And Melina has never yelled at Xan. “Promise you won't?”
You’re already perfect the way you are. Melina felt her heart squeeze. It wasn’t true, she knew, but the words still felt nice to hear. Melina wished her parents, either parent, would tell her that. That’s all she wanted since she was such a small child. It wasn’t quite the same hearing it from Xanthippe- but there was still a warmness to it. Melina truly wanted to believe her when she said that. She wanted to be perfect the way she was.
When she had taken Melina’s hands finally she lifted her tear-filled gaze to Xan. She spoke with such honesty, such sincerity that Melina truly felt that even if she didn’t agree with her handmaiden… Xan truly believed every word she was saying. And that hurt Melina more- for Xan was not at fault here. Xan was the perfect one in every way.
“The gift was amazing, Xan and I truly appreciate it,” Melina said, squeezing her hand maiden’s hands. “I… I’m not used to someone listening to me like you do. Most people just hear my words and only get the surface level. But you went out of your way to do something just because it’d make me happy. And I hadn’t even been speaking to you when I mentioned venison. You heard it and thought to surprise me and I’m touched beyond words. Xan, you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I wish more people were as thoughtful as you. You made me so happy, getting me something I hadn’t even asked for. It shows just how much you know me. And… And…”
Melina hesitated. “The man acted too fast. You hadn’t expected me to be by the window, we didn’t expect that man to be there to… to throw the rock. But you saved me from that pool of glass, you got the healer, you did everything right Xan. There’s no reason to be upset with yourself. If it wasn’t for you… if it wasn’t for you then I…” wouldn’t be here right now? Would be drowning in a sea of misery? “Wouldn’t have anything.” Was it sad, really, that Melina could have anything she wanted with her father’s money, but it was Xan that actually made Melina happy. She could have every book, every flower, every jewel, anything, but without Xanthippe Melina wouldn’t be sure how to… function.
Melina dropped her friend’s hand and wiped her tears again. This was all so much. All for a surprise, and now Melina felt like she was bearing her soul and having thought that were far too dark and emotional for a woman her age. Thoughts that she hadn’t even put in her diary- thoughts that she had buried so deep down that they were now suddenly bubbling up and she didn’t know how to handle them. “Xan, you’re not allowed to blame yourself anymore okay? I’ll get really mad. I’ll be furious. You save me every day just by making me happy. And you make me happy just by being my friend. So if I ever hear you say it’s your fault again I’ll yell.” And Melina has never yelled at Xan. “Promise you won't?”
Xanthippe listened to Melina speak, ready to protest, but she fell silent once more at what Melina was saying. Insisting she had done everything she was supposed to, that everything would have been worse if not for her, how thoughtful her gift was to start with… of course, that’s what Xan thought at first too, but now, after seeing her mistress’s reaction…
But if she said it was good, it was good. The handmaid couldn’t really argue with her there, not without turning this into a circle of apology and blame that neither would escape from any time soon. Besides, it served her better if Melina didn’t put the blame on her. Her position in the house was secure if no one found out everything she’d done wrong.
‘If it wasn’t for you… if it wasn’t for you then I… wouldn’t have anything.’
That wasn’t true, not even remotely so. Melina was a Leventi, for the gods’ sakes—the girl could have anything she wanted served on a silver platter. All she had to do was ask. But it was the sentiment behind what she said that touched something deep within Xanthippe, emotions stirred that usually sat so heavily unused. Clutching her mistress’s hand as if it was the only thing that anchored her to earth, her face softened, reaching to gently push a strand of hair back from her face.
The poor girl really has nothing then, doesn’t she? You’re hardly a prize.
If I’m good enough for you all, surely I’m good enough for a mortal woman.
Maybe we picked you because you’re so insignificant.
Sometimes, Xan wasn’t sure if the gods were on her side or against her, and she supposed it really came down to whichever one was speaking at the time. But that didn’t matter right now, not with Melina looking at her like that and pouring her heart out like wine. She squeezed the younger woman’s hand before it was released, subtly offering a handkerchief to dry the tears she so impatiently wiped away.
“I promise,” she murmured, though a detached part of her wondered what it would be like if Melina did yell and lose her temper. Would she hold all the fear and fury of her parents, or would it be more like an aggravated kitten? Xanthippe had a feeling there was something deeper within her mistress that others didn’t see, the true Leventi iron forming a spine that even her own family was too distracted to notice. Should she ever release it, Xan wished she could be there to see it, idly wondering if there was a way she could even tease it out. Not at her, of course, but at someone else…
Taking Melina’s hands again, she urged her to her feet with a smile and shoved such thoughts aside for the time being. Pulling her into a brief hug, she squeezed Melina’s shoulder as she pulled back. “Come on, my lady, let’s go take a round in the gardens. Something tells me you need it after today.”
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Xanthippe listened to Melina speak, ready to protest, but she fell silent once more at what Melina was saying. Insisting she had done everything she was supposed to, that everything would have been worse if not for her, how thoughtful her gift was to start with… of course, that’s what Xan thought at first too, but now, after seeing her mistress’s reaction…
But if she said it was good, it was good. The handmaid couldn’t really argue with her there, not without turning this into a circle of apology and blame that neither would escape from any time soon. Besides, it served her better if Melina didn’t put the blame on her. Her position in the house was secure if no one found out everything she’d done wrong.
‘If it wasn’t for you… if it wasn’t for you then I… wouldn’t have anything.’
That wasn’t true, not even remotely so. Melina was a Leventi, for the gods’ sakes—the girl could have anything she wanted served on a silver platter. All she had to do was ask. But it was the sentiment behind what she said that touched something deep within Xanthippe, emotions stirred that usually sat so heavily unused. Clutching her mistress’s hand as if it was the only thing that anchored her to earth, her face softened, reaching to gently push a strand of hair back from her face.
The poor girl really has nothing then, doesn’t she? You’re hardly a prize.
If I’m good enough for you all, surely I’m good enough for a mortal woman.
Maybe we picked you because you’re so insignificant.
Sometimes, Xan wasn’t sure if the gods were on her side or against her, and she supposed it really came down to whichever one was speaking at the time. But that didn’t matter right now, not with Melina looking at her like that and pouring her heart out like wine. She squeezed the younger woman’s hand before it was released, subtly offering a handkerchief to dry the tears she so impatiently wiped away.
“I promise,” she murmured, though a detached part of her wondered what it would be like if Melina did yell and lose her temper. Would she hold all the fear and fury of her parents, or would it be more like an aggravated kitten? Xanthippe had a feeling there was something deeper within her mistress that others didn’t see, the true Leventi iron forming a spine that even her own family was too distracted to notice. Should she ever release it, Xan wished she could be there to see it, idly wondering if there was a way she could even tease it out. Not at her, of course, but at someone else…
Taking Melina’s hands again, she urged her to her feet with a smile and shoved such thoughts aside for the time being. Pulling her into a brief hug, she squeezed Melina’s shoulder as she pulled back. “Come on, my lady, let’s go take a round in the gardens. Something tells me you need it after today.”
Xanthippe listened to Melina speak, ready to protest, but she fell silent once more at what Melina was saying. Insisting she had done everything she was supposed to, that everything would have been worse if not for her, how thoughtful her gift was to start with… of course, that’s what Xan thought at first too, but now, after seeing her mistress’s reaction…
But if she said it was good, it was good. The handmaid couldn’t really argue with her there, not without turning this into a circle of apology and blame that neither would escape from any time soon. Besides, it served her better if Melina didn’t put the blame on her. Her position in the house was secure if no one found out everything she’d done wrong.
‘If it wasn’t for you… if it wasn’t for you then I… wouldn’t have anything.’
That wasn’t true, not even remotely so. Melina was a Leventi, for the gods’ sakes—the girl could have anything she wanted served on a silver platter. All she had to do was ask. But it was the sentiment behind what she said that touched something deep within Xanthippe, emotions stirred that usually sat so heavily unused. Clutching her mistress’s hand as if it was the only thing that anchored her to earth, her face softened, reaching to gently push a strand of hair back from her face.
The poor girl really has nothing then, doesn’t she? You’re hardly a prize.
If I’m good enough for you all, surely I’m good enough for a mortal woman.
Maybe we picked you because you’re so insignificant.
Sometimes, Xan wasn’t sure if the gods were on her side or against her, and she supposed it really came down to whichever one was speaking at the time. But that didn’t matter right now, not with Melina looking at her like that and pouring her heart out like wine. She squeezed the younger woman’s hand before it was released, subtly offering a handkerchief to dry the tears she so impatiently wiped away.
“I promise,” she murmured, though a detached part of her wondered what it would be like if Melina did yell and lose her temper. Would she hold all the fear and fury of her parents, or would it be more like an aggravated kitten? Xanthippe had a feeling there was something deeper within her mistress that others didn’t see, the true Leventi iron forming a spine that even her own family was too distracted to notice. Should she ever release it, Xan wished she could be there to see it, idly wondering if there was a way she could even tease it out. Not at her, of course, but at someone else…
Taking Melina’s hands again, she urged her to her feet with a smile and shoved such thoughts aside for the time being. Pulling her into a brief hug, she squeezed Melina’s shoulder as she pulled back. “Come on, my lady, let’s go take a round in the gardens. Something tells me you need it after today.”
