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Despite living in the same palace, walking the same halls, and being together in the same great room for evening meals, he had not had any meaningful contact with Xene in what felt like months. Fighting a silent war with Irakles consumed his days and his nights were filled with Pia or Kat, or, if he wanted to be alone, wine to help him sleep. The wine, of course, left him feeling ill the next morning. Between the sleeplessness and his uncle, his temper was shorter than it usually was.
He and his advisors went round and round over plans for the upcoming campaign and it was like pulling teeth to get the ones who preferred to include Irakles in on their decisions to give him any sort of useful feedback. Somehow his uncle had entranced the whole court against him. These were men who, prior to his father’s death, had never said an ill word to him or indeed had a problem with him at all. He’d dined at their houses, chatted with their families. ….bedded some of their daughters.
But now? His uncle was currying favor with anyone and everyone he could. He felt foolish not to have seen before what the old man was doing. Now it was too late to change some of these men’s minds without some sort of huge spectacle. Like slaughtering The Creed. It was his plan that would kill two birds with one stone. On the one hand, he would have his vengeance. On the other? Win back the confidence that Irakles had eroded.
“Your majesty,” The door to the war room opened and a slip of a boy poked his head in. “Forgive me but the Princess Xene is awaiting your illustrious presence.”
“She can wait,” Stephanos waved him off without looking at him. His eyes were on the huge table before him. Poseikles, one of the youngest of his father’s advisors cleared his throat.
“Sire, if I may, we have been at this for a goodly portion of the morning. Perhaps a break and food might be what we need? Perhaps we might even take this up again tomorrow.”
Murmurs of agreement broke out amongst the rest of the men present. He straightened up and glared around at them all. Were they all in his uncle’s hand? It was getting harder to tell. Whenever someone disagreed with him, his assumption was that they were only following Irakles’s orders. Yet, that couldn’t be the case. Because he was not right all of the time. No one was.
They were right. He needed a break.
“Tell her I’ll be there directly,” he sighed, turning to the boy who bobbed up and down before disappearing again.
“Come, sire. I’ll walk you part of the way,” Poseikles put a hand on his shoulder, gently nudging him away from the table. He resisted long enough for the rest of his advisors to leave first before finally going out himself with Poseikles at his side. The paranoia was irritating. Never in his life had he been afflicted with it. Not since the whole of Taengea was turned upside down and inside out.
Sometimes he felt like a completely different person. Like maybe the Creed had actually completed their mission to kill him and that maybe this constant fear was the underworld and this was his punishment.
He and Poseikles parted ways just before the midway point from the war room to Xene’s apartments. From there, he made the trek alone. His mind was not on the food that his sister had planned or on the conversation she might have wanted to have. It was she who had invited him yesterday, not the other way around. Instead, he was still thinking on the unfinalized portions and problems that the gorge was giving them. And the number of men they would need.
With a brief knock at her door, he entered the room. It was as he remembered it and he went immediately to the cushion he always used when he came in here. They used to have long discussions about anything and everything. Now he didn’t say anything beyond the normal greeting. His features were still hard and his mind still elsewhere.
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Despite living in the same palace, walking the same halls, and being together in the same great room for evening meals, he had not had any meaningful contact with Xene in what felt like months. Fighting a silent war with Irakles consumed his days and his nights were filled with Pia or Kat, or, if he wanted to be alone, wine to help him sleep. The wine, of course, left him feeling ill the next morning. Between the sleeplessness and his uncle, his temper was shorter than it usually was.
He and his advisors went round and round over plans for the upcoming campaign and it was like pulling teeth to get the ones who preferred to include Irakles in on their decisions to give him any sort of useful feedback. Somehow his uncle had entranced the whole court against him. These were men who, prior to his father’s death, had never said an ill word to him or indeed had a problem with him at all. He’d dined at their houses, chatted with their families. ….bedded some of their daughters.
But now? His uncle was currying favor with anyone and everyone he could. He felt foolish not to have seen before what the old man was doing. Now it was too late to change some of these men’s minds without some sort of huge spectacle. Like slaughtering The Creed. It was his plan that would kill two birds with one stone. On the one hand, he would have his vengeance. On the other? Win back the confidence that Irakles had eroded.
“Your majesty,” The door to the war room opened and a slip of a boy poked his head in. “Forgive me but the Princess Xene is awaiting your illustrious presence.”
“She can wait,” Stephanos waved him off without looking at him. His eyes were on the huge table before him. Poseikles, one of the youngest of his father’s advisors cleared his throat.
“Sire, if I may, we have been at this for a goodly portion of the morning. Perhaps a break and food might be what we need? Perhaps we might even take this up again tomorrow.”
Murmurs of agreement broke out amongst the rest of the men present. He straightened up and glared around at them all. Were they all in his uncle’s hand? It was getting harder to tell. Whenever someone disagreed with him, his assumption was that they were only following Irakles’s orders. Yet, that couldn’t be the case. Because he was not right all of the time. No one was.
They were right. He needed a break.
“Tell her I’ll be there directly,” he sighed, turning to the boy who bobbed up and down before disappearing again.
“Come, sire. I’ll walk you part of the way,” Poseikles put a hand on his shoulder, gently nudging him away from the table. He resisted long enough for the rest of his advisors to leave first before finally going out himself with Poseikles at his side. The paranoia was irritating. Never in his life had he been afflicted with it. Not since the whole of Taengea was turned upside down and inside out.
Sometimes he felt like a completely different person. Like maybe the Creed had actually completed their mission to kill him and that maybe this constant fear was the underworld and this was his punishment.
He and Poseikles parted ways just before the midway point from the war room to Xene’s apartments. From there, he made the trek alone. His mind was not on the food that his sister had planned or on the conversation she might have wanted to have. It was she who had invited him yesterday, not the other way around. Instead, he was still thinking on the unfinalized portions and problems that the gorge was giving them. And the number of men they would need.
With a brief knock at her door, he entered the room. It was as he remembered it and he went immediately to the cushion he always used when he came in here. They used to have long discussions about anything and everything. Now he didn’t say anything beyond the normal greeting. His features were still hard and his mind still elsewhere.
Despite living in the same palace, walking the same halls, and being together in the same great room for evening meals, he had not had any meaningful contact with Xene in what felt like months. Fighting a silent war with Irakles consumed his days and his nights were filled with Pia or Kat, or, if he wanted to be alone, wine to help him sleep. The wine, of course, left him feeling ill the next morning. Between the sleeplessness and his uncle, his temper was shorter than it usually was.
He and his advisors went round and round over plans for the upcoming campaign and it was like pulling teeth to get the ones who preferred to include Irakles in on their decisions to give him any sort of useful feedback. Somehow his uncle had entranced the whole court against him. These were men who, prior to his father’s death, had never said an ill word to him or indeed had a problem with him at all. He’d dined at their houses, chatted with their families. ….bedded some of their daughters.
But now? His uncle was currying favor with anyone and everyone he could. He felt foolish not to have seen before what the old man was doing. Now it was too late to change some of these men’s minds without some sort of huge spectacle. Like slaughtering The Creed. It was his plan that would kill two birds with one stone. On the one hand, he would have his vengeance. On the other? Win back the confidence that Irakles had eroded.
“Your majesty,” The door to the war room opened and a slip of a boy poked his head in. “Forgive me but the Princess Xene is awaiting your illustrious presence.”
“She can wait,” Stephanos waved him off without looking at him. His eyes were on the huge table before him. Poseikles, one of the youngest of his father’s advisors cleared his throat.
“Sire, if I may, we have been at this for a goodly portion of the morning. Perhaps a break and food might be what we need? Perhaps we might even take this up again tomorrow.”
Murmurs of agreement broke out amongst the rest of the men present. He straightened up and glared around at them all. Were they all in his uncle’s hand? It was getting harder to tell. Whenever someone disagreed with him, his assumption was that they were only following Irakles’s orders. Yet, that couldn’t be the case. Because he was not right all of the time. No one was.
They were right. He needed a break.
“Tell her I’ll be there directly,” he sighed, turning to the boy who bobbed up and down before disappearing again.
“Come, sire. I’ll walk you part of the way,” Poseikles put a hand on his shoulder, gently nudging him away from the table. He resisted long enough for the rest of his advisors to leave first before finally going out himself with Poseikles at his side. The paranoia was irritating. Never in his life had he been afflicted with it. Not since the whole of Taengea was turned upside down and inside out.
Sometimes he felt like a completely different person. Like maybe the Creed had actually completed their mission to kill him and that maybe this constant fear was the underworld and this was his punishment.
He and Poseikles parted ways just before the midway point from the war room to Xene’s apartments. From there, he made the trek alone. His mind was not on the food that his sister had planned or on the conversation she might have wanted to have. It was she who had invited him yesterday, not the other way around. Instead, he was still thinking on the unfinalized portions and problems that the gorge was giving them. And the number of men they would need.
With a brief knock at her door, he entered the room. It was as he remembered it and he went immediately to the cushion he always used when he came in here. They used to have long discussions about anything and everything. Now he didn’t say anything beyond the normal greeting. His features were still hard and his mind still elsewhere.
Xene had felt the absence of her brother’s presence, her living brother, in pretty much everything as of late. Ever since the encounter at the fountain, he had still remained distant. And as stubborn and firm as the princess could be, she still would not be the type to force Stephanos’ hand in making him talk to her. The invite had been half-hearted, the woman feeling mildly scorned after the last few blatant rejections at getting to keep her own brother’s company.
Where they had once been close, Xene suddenly found herself viewing her own sibling as a stranger. That thought left her frustrated and irritable. This was not how things were supposed to work. Their relationship as confidants was not supposed to end the moment her brother had taken the crown.
With the last afternoon spent in the company of Lord Leventi working silently in his office simply for the sake of not being entirely alone with her thoughts, Xene had returned to the palace toward sunset with a request that Stephanos joined her for lunch the next day. Another try and another ignored invitation, most likely. That was how things had started to work with him, and it was no wonder she had started keeping to herself. The loss of her own confidant, her best friend, was enough to keep her just slightly out of reach of Stephanos. If he was pleased with the silence, then that was what she had deigned to give him for all of his trouble.
Dressed in a soft robin’s egg blue chiton, Xene’s hair had been done up in soft braids, the mass of hair curled into small ringlets over her shoulder. She wore one of her more modest tiaras, choosing to keep garb simple, but no less striking.
The food was freshly prepared and filed into her rooms, but after an hour of waiting, the princess found herself feeling rather bitter. She fingered her goblet of water as she stared out the window of her chambers, blue eyes pricking slightly with tears. He was such an ass, Stephanos. And she continued to think so even as she brought her cup to her lips. She thought briefly of Zach’s letters, carefully concealed under some books on her desk, asking herself why it was that the men in this family found it necessary to say nothing at all of their troubles, ills, and reservations.
Only when the soft knocking on the door sounded and Stephanos stepped into her room did she straighten. Stolen from the bitter thoughts regarding said man, Xene turned from the sunshine, looking the man up and down with quiet consideration. He was still an ass, she concluded. Only an ass was this late. Leaning into the stone behind her, Xene took another drink of her water, eyeing her brother with a critical expression.
Stephanos said nothing and that wounded her more than she would ever care to admit in his presence.
But she would not play into his foul mood no matter how he wounded her. Striding barefoot to the edge of the table filled with small refreshments, Xene grabbed for a second goblet, silently pouring Stephanos his own cup. Xene approached him calmly, passing it to him and then settling herself on a lounge across from him. Delicate jewelry circled her upper arm and it glistened with the rays of early morning sunshine. Her cat padded lazily over from the bed, jumping into his master’s lap and daring to purr just a little loudly as it suited him.
The princess stroked russet fur affectionately, still not taking her gaze off of her brother. “Am I being ignored for any particular reason, Stephanos?” Xene questioned boldly, having lost her filter years ago. Propriety only extended so far until tact had absolutely no effect. And in her experience, Stephanos did not benefit from tact. “Or do you simply find yourself done with my company now that your queen and sizable council have your ear?”
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Xene had felt the absence of her brother’s presence, her living brother, in pretty much everything as of late. Ever since the encounter at the fountain, he had still remained distant. And as stubborn and firm as the princess could be, she still would not be the type to force Stephanos’ hand in making him talk to her. The invite had been half-hearted, the woman feeling mildly scorned after the last few blatant rejections at getting to keep her own brother’s company.
Where they had once been close, Xene suddenly found herself viewing her own sibling as a stranger. That thought left her frustrated and irritable. This was not how things were supposed to work. Their relationship as confidants was not supposed to end the moment her brother had taken the crown.
With the last afternoon spent in the company of Lord Leventi working silently in his office simply for the sake of not being entirely alone with her thoughts, Xene had returned to the palace toward sunset with a request that Stephanos joined her for lunch the next day. Another try and another ignored invitation, most likely. That was how things had started to work with him, and it was no wonder she had started keeping to herself. The loss of her own confidant, her best friend, was enough to keep her just slightly out of reach of Stephanos. If he was pleased with the silence, then that was what she had deigned to give him for all of his trouble.
Dressed in a soft robin’s egg blue chiton, Xene’s hair had been done up in soft braids, the mass of hair curled into small ringlets over her shoulder. She wore one of her more modest tiaras, choosing to keep garb simple, but no less striking.
The food was freshly prepared and filed into her rooms, but after an hour of waiting, the princess found herself feeling rather bitter. She fingered her goblet of water as she stared out the window of her chambers, blue eyes pricking slightly with tears. He was such an ass, Stephanos. And she continued to think so even as she brought her cup to her lips. She thought briefly of Zach’s letters, carefully concealed under some books on her desk, asking herself why it was that the men in this family found it necessary to say nothing at all of their troubles, ills, and reservations.
Only when the soft knocking on the door sounded and Stephanos stepped into her room did she straighten. Stolen from the bitter thoughts regarding said man, Xene turned from the sunshine, looking the man up and down with quiet consideration. He was still an ass, she concluded. Only an ass was this late. Leaning into the stone behind her, Xene took another drink of her water, eyeing her brother with a critical expression.
Stephanos said nothing and that wounded her more than she would ever care to admit in his presence.
But she would not play into his foul mood no matter how he wounded her. Striding barefoot to the edge of the table filled with small refreshments, Xene grabbed for a second goblet, silently pouring Stephanos his own cup. Xene approached him calmly, passing it to him and then settling herself on a lounge across from him. Delicate jewelry circled her upper arm and it glistened with the rays of early morning sunshine. Her cat padded lazily over from the bed, jumping into his master’s lap and daring to purr just a little loudly as it suited him.
The princess stroked russet fur affectionately, still not taking her gaze off of her brother. “Am I being ignored for any particular reason, Stephanos?” Xene questioned boldly, having lost her filter years ago. Propriety only extended so far until tact had absolutely no effect. And in her experience, Stephanos did not benefit from tact. “Or do you simply find yourself done with my company now that your queen and sizable council have your ear?”
Xene had felt the absence of her brother’s presence, her living brother, in pretty much everything as of late. Ever since the encounter at the fountain, he had still remained distant. And as stubborn and firm as the princess could be, she still would not be the type to force Stephanos’ hand in making him talk to her. The invite had been half-hearted, the woman feeling mildly scorned after the last few blatant rejections at getting to keep her own brother’s company.
Where they had once been close, Xene suddenly found herself viewing her own sibling as a stranger. That thought left her frustrated and irritable. This was not how things were supposed to work. Their relationship as confidants was not supposed to end the moment her brother had taken the crown.
With the last afternoon spent in the company of Lord Leventi working silently in his office simply for the sake of not being entirely alone with her thoughts, Xene had returned to the palace toward sunset with a request that Stephanos joined her for lunch the next day. Another try and another ignored invitation, most likely. That was how things had started to work with him, and it was no wonder she had started keeping to herself. The loss of her own confidant, her best friend, was enough to keep her just slightly out of reach of Stephanos. If he was pleased with the silence, then that was what she had deigned to give him for all of his trouble.
Dressed in a soft robin’s egg blue chiton, Xene’s hair had been done up in soft braids, the mass of hair curled into small ringlets over her shoulder. She wore one of her more modest tiaras, choosing to keep garb simple, but no less striking.
The food was freshly prepared and filed into her rooms, but after an hour of waiting, the princess found herself feeling rather bitter. She fingered her goblet of water as she stared out the window of her chambers, blue eyes pricking slightly with tears. He was such an ass, Stephanos. And she continued to think so even as she brought her cup to her lips. She thought briefly of Zach’s letters, carefully concealed under some books on her desk, asking herself why it was that the men in this family found it necessary to say nothing at all of their troubles, ills, and reservations.
Only when the soft knocking on the door sounded and Stephanos stepped into her room did she straighten. Stolen from the bitter thoughts regarding said man, Xene turned from the sunshine, looking the man up and down with quiet consideration. He was still an ass, she concluded. Only an ass was this late. Leaning into the stone behind her, Xene took another drink of her water, eyeing her brother with a critical expression.
Stephanos said nothing and that wounded her more than she would ever care to admit in his presence.
But she would not play into his foul mood no matter how he wounded her. Striding barefoot to the edge of the table filled with small refreshments, Xene grabbed for a second goblet, silently pouring Stephanos his own cup. Xene approached him calmly, passing it to him and then settling herself on a lounge across from him. Delicate jewelry circled her upper arm and it glistened with the rays of early morning sunshine. Her cat padded lazily over from the bed, jumping into his master’s lap and daring to purr just a little loudly as it suited him.
The princess stroked russet fur affectionately, still not taking her gaze off of her brother. “Am I being ignored for any particular reason, Stephanos?” Xene questioned boldly, having lost her filter years ago. Propriety only extended so far until tact had absolutely no effect. And in her experience, Stephanos did not benefit from tact. “Or do you simply find yourself done with my company now that your queen and sizable council have your ear?”
“Am I being ignored for any particular reason, Stephanos?”
“What?” Incredulity laced his voice. He turned to look at her and his eyes immediately dropped to the cat curled up in her lap. She always had been fond of animals. The only ones he’d ever truly taken a liking to were horses. Otherwise, dogs and cats? They were fine if they belonged to someone else. He was too much away from home to give those kind of pets the kind of attention they wanted. Xene, on the other hand, so far as he knew, didn’t go much of anywhere.
“Or do you simply find yourself done with my company now that your queen and sizable council have your ear?”
He rolled his eyes and stared up at the ceiling, settling back and gritting his teeth into something like a smile. This was why he had not come before. He did not need Xene’s critical eye trained on him, the way she looked at the rest of the court.
“I haven’t ignored you,” he reached toward the table and took up one of the wine goblets, drinking deeply of it as he side eyed her. “Your invitations have….come at bad times.” Leaning forward, he placed the nearly empty cup back on the table and looked her over again.
“You’re looking well,” he sighed. At least one of them was. He was tired. Even when he slept, the next morning he was still exhausted. Each day was a battle with both Irakles and his advisors and his family members. Nothing was simple. And now, he’d managed to offend his sister. He could see it in her body language. She was stiff and imperious. Her voice was also edged dangerously, as though daring him to step on one of her verbal traps.
“I suppose you’ve been speaking to mother, then?” he asked, in reference to her saying that he wasn’t listening to anyone but Olympia or the council. The truth was he couldn’t really tell who he was able to listen to anymore. But his mother didn’t want him to go to his wife or to his advisors. They were all superfluous. What she wanted was for him to sit at his uncle’s feet and have the prince teach him all that there was to know.
He’d rather fall on his own sword than follow what Irakles wanted.
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“Am I being ignored for any particular reason, Stephanos?”
“What?” Incredulity laced his voice. He turned to look at her and his eyes immediately dropped to the cat curled up in her lap. She always had been fond of animals. The only ones he’d ever truly taken a liking to were horses. Otherwise, dogs and cats? They were fine if they belonged to someone else. He was too much away from home to give those kind of pets the kind of attention they wanted. Xene, on the other hand, so far as he knew, didn’t go much of anywhere.
“Or do you simply find yourself done with my company now that your queen and sizable council have your ear?”
He rolled his eyes and stared up at the ceiling, settling back and gritting his teeth into something like a smile. This was why he had not come before. He did not need Xene’s critical eye trained on him, the way she looked at the rest of the court.
“I haven’t ignored you,” he reached toward the table and took up one of the wine goblets, drinking deeply of it as he side eyed her. “Your invitations have….come at bad times.” Leaning forward, he placed the nearly empty cup back on the table and looked her over again.
“You’re looking well,” he sighed. At least one of them was. He was tired. Even when he slept, the next morning he was still exhausted. Each day was a battle with both Irakles and his advisors and his family members. Nothing was simple. And now, he’d managed to offend his sister. He could see it in her body language. She was stiff and imperious. Her voice was also edged dangerously, as though daring him to step on one of her verbal traps.
“I suppose you’ve been speaking to mother, then?” he asked, in reference to her saying that he wasn’t listening to anyone but Olympia or the council. The truth was he couldn’t really tell who he was able to listen to anymore. But his mother didn’t want him to go to his wife or to his advisors. They were all superfluous. What she wanted was for him to sit at his uncle’s feet and have the prince teach him all that there was to know.
He’d rather fall on his own sword than follow what Irakles wanted.
“Am I being ignored for any particular reason, Stephanos?”
“What?” Incredulity laced his voice. He turned to look at her and his eyes immediately dropped to the cat curled up in her lap. She always had been fond of animals. The only ones he’d ever truly taken a liking to were horses. Otherwise, dogs and cats? They were fine if they belonged to someone else. He was too much away from home to give those kind of pets the kind of attention they wanted. Xene, on the other hand, so far as he knew, didn’t go much of anywhere.
“Or do you simply find yourself done with my company now that your queen and sizable council have your ear?”
He rolled his eyes and stared up at the ceiling, settling back and gritting his teeth into something like a smile. This was why he had not come before. He did not need Xene’s critical eye trained on him, the way she looked at the rest of the court.
“I haven’t ignored you,” he reached toward the table and took up one of the wine goblets, drinking deeply of it as he side eyed her. “Your invitations have….come at bad times.” Leaning forward, he placed the nearly empty cup back on the table and looked her over again.
“You’re looking well,” he sighed. At least one of them was. He was tired. Even when he slept, the next morning he was still exhausted. Each day was a battle with both Irakles and his advisors and his family members. Nothing was simple. And now, he’d managed to offend his sister. He could see it in her body language. She was stiff and imperious. Her voice was also edged dangerously, as though daring him to step on one of her verbal traps.
“I suppose you’ve been speaking to mother, then?” he asked, in reference to her saying that he wasn’t listening to anyone but Olympia or the council. The truth was he couldn’t really tell who he was able to listen to anymore. But his mother didn’t want him to go to his wife or to his advisors. They were all superfluous. What she wanted was for him to sit at his uncle’s feet and have the prince teach him all that there was to know.
He’d rather fall on his own sword than follow what Irakles wanted.
Xene stared at her brother with a lifted eyebrow, noting the way he seemed to offend at her comment about being ignored. If she didn't know any better, she would have said that she'd caught him. His comment about her invitations coming at bad times was absolute horse manure, and Xene knew it all too well. Considering that talk that fluttered to her ear with only a simple request? Stephanos had not been found to do much at night except...
The princess visibly rolled her eyes at the excuses he gave, sitting up rather sharply and taking her goblet. She drained it quickly, setting it back down with a firm hand that would be sure to show her irritation.
"Don't look so surprised, Stephanos," Xene commented, blue eyes trailing his form without much pretense. "I can tell you've been ignoring me," she murmured then, her expression just slightly wounded, "Though, I'm not sure whether its because I tell you things how I see them or if you're too... distracted by outside forces. Say... pretty little ladies to your wife?"
The princess was back on her feet then, moving to grab the jug of wine and bring it back between them. She poured herself another cup, lifting her chin slightly though her gaze remained on her cup. "And before you say anything else. My eyes don't lie. She left your rooms this morning." She took it upon herself to refill his cup, keeping her eyes cast downward.
The comment on her health had her bringing her critical gaze back to him once more. "Truthfully," Xene murmured then, her shoulders slumping, "I'm merely surviving. For now," she took another sip of her wine, glancing toward the window as she fell silent for a few long moments. "I guess we all deal with our grief in different ways," she added, shaking her head.
'And then you became king and left me behind,' she kept that second thought to herself, avoiding his gaze.
"Considering the only people I truly get to converse with are mother, Gianna, and members of the court, barring yourself, yes," Xene lifted an eyebrow in his direction then. "One cannot expect a child to avoid speaking with the woman who birthed them," she sighed, tearing her gaze from him once more. This time, her gaze landed on the writing desk. "But I haven't been asking for your company for weeks to talk about myself or our mother or even your nighttime dalliances, my king," she murmured.
Rising back to her feet, the princess stepped slowly around the side of the lounge, her fingers grazing the contour of the furniture piece. "It was a shock to me," Xene started, "Finding out that you were always to be King. Zacharias was always so duty-bound and prepared, but there is doubt in my mind that he would have kept the throne when it finally fell to him," Xene said quietly, glancing once more to the writing desk. She swallowed, starting across the floor and reaching for the stack of letters. Gripping them delicately in hand, her gaze trailed across one particular line.
She read it aloud, "I feel as a wife left home while her husband wages a war, except your war is the people around you, and I am no wife of yours." Swallowing again, she breathed out the name at the end of the letter, "Forever yours, N." Her feet carried her back to the lounge, her gaze still settled on the pages in hand. "N was Zacharias' lover... there are... years worth of letters here from this man. Years of words of love and devotion to one another that tell the truth of it. Of Zach."
Carefully, Xene handed the stack of letters over to Stephanos, her brow furrowed. "Brother," the princess breathed, "You were always going to be king."
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Xene stared at her brother with a lifted eyebrow, noting the way he seemed to offend at her comment about being ignored. If she didn't know any better, she would have said that she'd caught him. His comment about her invitations coming at bad times was absolute horse manure, and Xene knew it all too well. Considering that talk that fluttered to her ear with only a simple request? Stephanos had not been found to do much at night except...
The princess visibly rolled her eyes at the excuses he gave, sitting up rather sharply and taking her goblet. She drained it quickly, setting it back down with a firm hand that would be sure to show her irritation.
"Don't look so surprised, Stephanos," Xene commented, blue eyes trailing his form without much pretense. "I can tell you've been ignoring me," she murmured then, her expression just slightly wounded, "Though, I'm not sure whether its because I tell you things how I see them or if you're too... distracted by outside forces. Say... pretty little ladies to your wife?"
The princess was back on her feet then, moving to grab the jug of wine and bring it back between them. She poured herself another cup, lifting her chin slightly though her gaze remained on her cup. "And before you say anything else. My eyes don't lie. She left your rooms this morning." She took it upon herself to refill his cup, keeping her eyes cast downward.
The comment on her health had her bringing her critical gaze back to him once more. "Truthfully," Xene murmured then, her shoulders slumping, "I'm merely surviving. For now," she took another sip of her wine, glancing toward the window as she fell silent for a few long moments. "I guess we all deal with our grief in different ways," she added, shaking her head.
'And then you became king and left me behind,' she kept that second thought to herself, avoiding his gaze.
"Considering the only people I truly get to converse with are mother, Gianna, and members of the court, barring yourself, yes," Xene lifted an eyebrow in his direction then. "One cannot expect a child to avoid speaking with the woman who birthed them," she sighed, tearing her gaze from him once more. This time, her gaze landed on the writing desk. "But I haven't been asking for your company for weeks to talk about myself or our mother or even your nighttime dalliances, my king," she murmured.
Rising back to her feet, the princess stepped slowly around the side of the lounge, her fingers grazing the contour of the furniture piece. "It was a shock to me," Xene started, "Finding out that you were always to be King. Zacharias was always so duty-bound and prepared, but there is doubt in my mind that he would have kept the throne when it finally fell to him," Xene said quietly, glancing once more to the writing desk. She swallowed, starting across the floor and reaching for the stack of letters. Gripping them delicately in hand, her gaze trailed across one particular line.
She read it aloud, "I feel as a wife left home while her husband wages a war, except your war is the people around you, and I am no wife of yours." Swallowing again, she breathed out the name at the end of the letter, "Forever yours, N." Her feet carried her back to the lounge, her gaze still settled on the pages in hand. "N was Zacharias' lover... there are... years worth of letters here from this man. Years of words of love and devotion to one another that tell the truth of it. Of Zach."
Carefully, Xene handed the stack of letters over to Stephanos, her brow furrowed. "Brother," the princess breathed, "You were always going to be king."
Xene stared at her brother with a lifted eyebrow, noting the way he seemed to offend at her comment about being ignored. If she didn't know any better, she would have said that she'd caught him. His comment about her invitations coming at bad times was absolute horse manure, and Xene knew it all too well. Considering that talk that fluttered to her ear with only a simple request? Stephanos had not been found to do much at night except...
The princess visibly rolled her eyes at the excuses he gave, sitting up rather sharply and taking her goblet. She drained it quickly, setting it back down with a firm hand that would be sure to show her irritation.
"Don't look so surprised, Stephanos," Xene commented, blue eyes trailing his form without much pretense. "I can tell you've been ignoring me," she murmured then, her expression just slightly wounded, "Though, I'm not sure whether its because I tell you things how I see them or if you're too... distracted by outside forces. Say... pretty little ladies to your wife?"
The princess was back on her feet then, moving to grab the jug of wine and bring it back between them. She poured herself another cup, lifting her chin slightly though her gaze remained on her cup. "And before you say anything else. My eyes don't lie. She left your rooms this morning." She took it upon herself to refill his cup, keeping her eyes cast downward.
The comment on her health had her bringing her critical gaze back to him once more. "Truthfully," Xene murmured then, her shoulders slumping, "I'm merely surviving. For now," she took another sip of her wine, glancing toward the window as she fell silent for a few long moments. "I guess we all deal with our grief in different ways," she added, shaking her head.
'And then you became king and left me behind,' she kept that second thought to herself, avoiding his gaze.
"Considering the only people I truly get to converse with are mother, Gianna, and members of the court, barring yourself, yes," Xene lifted an eyebrow in his direction then. "One cannot expect a child to avoid speaking with the woman who birthed them," she sighed, tearing her gaze from him once more. This time, her gaze landed on the writing desk. "But I haven't been asking for your company for weeks to talk about myself or our mother or even your nighttime dalliances, my king," she murmured.
Rising back to her feet, the princess stepped slowly around the side of the lounge, her fingers grazing the contour of the furniture piece. "It was a shock to me," Xene started, "Finding out that you were always to be King. Zacharias was always so duty-bound and prepared, but there is doubt in my mind that he would have kept the throne when it finally fell to him," Xene said quietly, glancing once more to the writing desk. She swallowed, starting across the floor and reaching for the stack of letters. Gripping them delicately in hand, her gaze trailed across one particular line.
She read it aloud, "I feel as a wife left home while her husband wages a war, except your war is the people around you, and I am no wife of yours." Swallowing again, she breathed out the name at the end of the letter, "Forever yours, N." Her feet carried her back to the lounge, her gaze still settled on the pages in hand. "N was Zacharias' lover... there are... years worth of letters here from this man. Years of words of love and devotion to one another that tell the truth of it. Of Zach."
Carefully, Xene handed the stack of letters over to Stephanos, her brow furrowed. "Brother," the princess breathed, "You were always going to be king."
His stomach hurt and this throat burned a little. Xene’s hurt feelings were nothing new. But he hadn’t given one thought to them in his decision not to answer any of her invitations with a ‘yes’. Firstly, because he’d not thought that she had issued so many. Secondly because she was his sister. Not a lover and her feelings were a little different. She was family and, to his mind, at least, that meant forgiveness was always possible. But she was clearly hurt.
He looked away.
"I can tell you've been ignoring me, though, I'm not sure whether its because I tell you things how I see them or if you're too... distracted by outside forces. Say... pretty little ladies to your wife?"
His sharp gaze jerked back to his sister as she stared him down.
Aikaterine’s visits were supposed to be secret, and had been. Mostly. But Xene didn’t know anything. That was just a guess. She was an intelligent woman and could piece two and two together fairly quickly. The fact that Aikaterine was beautiful and happened to be Olympia’s new lady in waiting were just coincidences. And before he could lie about it….
"And before you say anything else. My eyes don't lie. She left your rooms this morning."
“Dammit,” he cursed under his breath and drained his wine glass in frustration.
“Pia’s in a delicate situation,” he kept his gaze on the empty bottom of the cup. “And will be for some months yet. What do you expect me to do?” here he flicked his eyes up in a frigid challenge.
Her comment about everyone dealing with their grief in different ways was the absolute truth. He hadn’t been dealing with it. And he didn’t plan to. The more he could forget it, the better. Which was where Aikaterine came in. Or wine. He reached out and poured himself more, drinking this cup slower than the last. It burned in his throat and left an acrid taste in the back of his mouth.
As soon as the alcohol hit his stomach, he grimaced as another round of pain momentarily took away his attention as she spoke about their mother and Gianna. He clutched at his stomach as she got up and crossed the room to her desk. Gods. He felt like his insides were tearing into themselves, stabbing. It was from his throat to his stomach and more alcohol seemed only to make it worse...but if he drank enough of it, the pain went away completely for a while.
He focused on breathing as Xene came back, talking about Zacharias. At first he wasn’t listening closely, but a few words drew his attention. ‘Lover’ and ‘Devotion’ and ‘Man’.
“Zacharias didn’t have lovers,” he said irritably. Why that was, he didn’t know. But he’d never seen his brother so much as entertain a woman, even though Pia’s sister Selene had been throwing herself at him for years. It was precisely the girl’s desperation that had been off putting to him personally, and he didn’t begrudge his brother for not partaking in that particular invitation. She was beautiful but didn’t seem as though she’d be much fun. Not like Pia.
Xene handed the stack of letters to him and he accepted them without looking down at them. Her gaze had him concerned. What she said next, even more so.
"Brother, you were always going to be king."
“No,” he said firmly and finally looked down at the huge stack of letters in his lap. “No…” he murmured again, picking up one and glancing at it. “I don’t think you’re…….” his voice trailed away as he began to read. “.....right……” His brows knit together in confusion. “How…..” Every word in the letters was laced with feeling and meaning. At first it didn’t register that these were love letters to a man. But once it did, he felt a little ill.
“This is…” he finally glanced up at Xene. Disbelief etched itself in every feature. As much as he wanted to shove the letters off his lap, he couldn’t. These were written in someone else’s hand. To his brother. But these were half of a conversation he’d never known was taking place. That his brother had never seen fit to confide in him. And if Zacharias had never planned on taking a wife………………………….when was he going to break the news?
His brother had known that he’d never wanted the throne. And to find out that he was always destined for it?
“No.” At last he did shove the papers. Hard. The flew in a flurry around his feet and he stood up, pacing from one side of the room to another, staring at the floor without seeing it. “No this is...He wouldn’t. He was the crown prince. His duty was to produce an heir. He would have done that.”
Men did it all the time. Sleeping with women they didn’t like or love. Usually there was at least some attraction there….surely his brother could have roused himself to at least attempt it…..
“How long have you known?” he demanded, angry now.
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His stomach hurt and this throat burned a little. Xene’s hurt feelings were nothing new. But he hadn’t given one thought to them in his decision not to answer any of her invitations with a ‘yes’. Firstly, because he’d not thought that she had issued so many. Secondly because she was his sister. Not a lover and her feelings were a little different. She was family and, to his mind, at least, that meant forgiveness was always possible. But she was clearly hurt.
He looked away.
"I can tell you've been ignoring me, though, I'm not sure whether its because I tell you things how I see them or if you're too... distracted by outside forces. Say... pretty little ladies to your wife?"
His sharp gaze jerked back to his sister as she stared him down.
Aikaterine’s visits were supposed to be secret, and had been. Mostly. But Xene didn’t know anything. That was just a guess. She was an intelligent woman and could piece two and two together fairly quickly. The fact that Aikaterine was beautiful and happened to be Olympia’s new lady in waiting were just coincidences. And before he could lie about it….
"And before you say anything else. My eyes don't lie. She left your rooms this morning."
“Dammit,” he cursed under his breath and drained his wine glass in frustration.
“Pia’s in a delicate situation,” he kept his gaze on the empty bottom of the cup. “And will be for some months yet. What do you expect me to do?” here he flicked his eyes up in a frigid challenge.
Her comment about everyone dealing with their grief in different ways was the absolute truth. He hadn’t been dealing with it. And he didn’t plan to. The more he could forget it, the better. Which was where Aikaterine came in. Or wine. He reached out and poured himself more, drinking this cup slower than the last. It burned in his throat and left an acrid taste in the back of his mouth.
As soon as the alcohol hit his stomach, he grimaced as another round of pain momentarily took away his attention as she spoke about their mother and Gianna. He clutched at his stomach as she got up and crossed the room to her desk. Gods. He felt like his insides were tearing into themselves, stabbing. It was from his throat to his stomach and more alcohol seemed only to make it worse...but if he drank enough of it, the pain went away completely for a while.
He focused on breathing as Xene came back, talking about Zacharias. At first he wasn’t listening closely, but a few words drew his attention. ‘Lover’ and ‘Devotion’ and ‘Man’.
“Zacharias didn’t have lovers,” he said irritably. Why that was, he didn’t know. But he’d never seen his brother so much as entertain a woman, even though Pia’s sister Selene had been throwing herself at him for years. It was precisely the girl’s desperation that had been off putting to him personally, and he didn’t begrudge his brother for not partaking in that particular invitation. She was beautiful but didn’t seem as though she’d be much fun. Not like Pia.
Xene handed the stack of letters to him and he accepted them without looking down at them. Her gaze had him concerned. What she said next, even more so.
"Brother, you were always going to be king."
“No,” he said firmly and finally looked down at the huge stack of letters in his lap. “No…” he murmured again, picking up one and glancing at it. “I don’t think you’re…….” his voice trailed away as he began to read. “.....right……” His brows knit together in confusion. “How…..” Every word in the letters was laced with feeling and meaning. At first it didn’t register that these were love letters to a man. But once it did, he felt a little ill.
“This is…” he finally glanced up at Xene. Disbelief etched itself in every feature. As much as he wanted to shove the letters off his lap, he couldn’t. These were written in someone else’s hand. To his brother. But these were half of a conversation he’d never known was taking place. That his brother had never seen fit to confide in him. And if Zacharias had never planned on taking a wife………………………….when was he going to break the news?
His brother had known that he’d never wanted the throne. And to find out that he was always destined for it?
“No.” At last he did shove the papers. Hard. The flew in a flurry around his feet and he stood up, pacing from one side of the room to another, staring at the floor without seeing it. “No this is...He wouldn’t. He was the crown prince. His duty was to produce an heir. He would have done that.”
Men did it all the time. Sleeping with women they didn’t like or love. Usually there was at least some attraction there….surely his brother could have roused himself to at least attempt it…..
“How long have you known?” he demanded, angry now.
His stomach hurt and this throat burned a little. Xene’s hurt feelings were nothing new. But he hadn’t given one thought to them in his decision not to answer any of her invitations with a ‘yes’. Firstly, because he’d not thought that she had issued so many. Secondly because she was his sister. Not a lover and her feelings were a little different. She was family and, to his mind, at least, that meant forgiveness was always possible. But she was clearly hurt.
He looked away.
"I can tell you've been ignoring me, though, I'm not sure whether its because I tell you things how I see them or if you're too... distracted by outside forces. Say... pretty little ladies to your wife?"
His sharp gaze jerked back to his sister as she stared him down.
Aikaterine’s visits were supposed to be secret, and had been. Mostly. But Xene didn’t know anything. That was just a guess. She was an intelligent woman and could piece two and two together fairly quickly. The fact that Aikaterine was beautiful and happened to be Olympia’s new lady in waiting were just coincidences. And before he could lie about it….
"And before you say anything else. My eyes don't lie. She left your rooms this morning."
“Dammit,” he cursed under his breath and drained his wine glass in frustration.
“Pia’s in a delicate situation,” he kept his gaze on the empty bottom of the cup. “And will be for some months yet. What do you expect me to do?” here he flicked his eyes up in a frigid challenge.
Her comment about everyone dealing with their grief in different ways was the absolute truth. He hadn’t been dealing with it. And he didn’t plan to. The more he could forget it, the better. Which was where Aikaterine came in. Or wine. He reached out and poured himself more, drinking this cup slower than the last. It burned in his throat and left an acrid taste in the back of his mouth.
As soon as the alcohol hit his stomach, he grimaced as another round of pain momentarily took away his attention as she spoke about their mother and Gianna. He clutched at his stomach as she got up and crossed the room to her desk. Gods. He felt like his insides were tearing into themselves, stabbing. It was from his throat to his stomach and more alcohol seemed only to make it worse...but if he drank enough of it, the pain went away completely for a while.
He focused on breathing as Xene came back, talking about Zacharias. At first he wasn’t listening closely, but a few words drew his attention. ‘Lover’ and ‘Devotion’ and ‘Man’.
“Zacharias didn’t have lovers,” he said irritably. Why that was, he didn’t know. But he’d never seen his brother so much as entertain a woman, even though Pia’s sister Selene had been throwing herself at him for years. It was precisely the girl’s desperation that had been off putting to him personally, and he didn’t begrudge his brother for not partaking in that particular invitation. She was beautiful but didn’t seem as though she’d be much fun. Not like Pia.
Xene handed the stack of letters to him and he accepted them without looking down at them. Her gaze had him concerned. What she said next, even more so.
"Brother, you were always going to be king."
“No,” he said firmly and finally looked down at the huge stack of letters in his lap. “No…” he murmured again, picking up one and glancing at it. “I don’t think you’re…….” his voice trailed away as he began to read. “.....right……” His brows knit together in confusion. “How…..” Every word in the letters was laced with feeling and meaning. At first it didn’t register that these were love letters to a man. But once it did, he felt a little ill.
“This is…” he finally glanced up at Xene. Disbelief etched itself in every feature. As much as he wanted to shove the letters off his lap, he couldn’t. These were written in someone else’s hand. To his brother. But these were half of a conversation he’d never known was taking place. That his brother had never seen fit to confide in him. And if Zacharias had never planned on taking a wife………………………….when was he going to break the news?
His brother had known that he’d never wanted the throne. And to find out that he was always destined for it?
“No.” At last he did shove the papers. Hard. The flew in a flurry around his feet and he stood up, pacing from one side of the room to another, staring at the floor without seeing it. “No this is...He wouldn’t. He was the crown prince. His duty was to produce an heir. He would have done that.”
Men did it all the time. Sleeping with women they didn’t like or love. Usually there was at least some attraction there….surely his brother could have roused himself to at least attempt it…..
“How long have you known?” he demanded, angry now.
Xene had placed herself on the other side of the lounge, her fingertips trailing wood and fabric as she observed her brother reading the letters. At first, he saw fit to argue the point that their brother hadn't wanted to be king, but reading further, Xene realized that he'd taken to the idea quickly. Whether he wanted to or not, he'd started to get the point that Xene was making about their brother.
She herself had been distraught with the knowledge. It had taken days to wrap her mind around it, but she hadn't come away disgusted. Picturing her brother with another man was no different than her picturing herself with a woman. A habit she'd made young into her life when men had been of no particular interest and inexperience with romance had made her wary of the male gaze. While confident, Xene had no particular foothold in her ability to satisfy a man. Her chastity stood in the way of that. Her imagination had simply been a filter, an escape.
But that was one thing that Xene would never utter to anyone. Not even her own brother. On the list of things you did and did not tell your closest sibling was the fact that you had, and still did from time to time, fancy the ladies of the court in addition to the men.
It was when the papers went flying that her breath caught and she rushed forward. Despite the fact that they were written in the hand of another man, these letters had still been cherished and cared for by her brother. And Xene struggled to let go of the things that her brother owned and favored. Even so, Xene knew in the back of her mind that these letters would not survive this meeting with her brother. That didn't mean she wasn't going to savor them for a time.
Bending slowly, Xene gathered each paper slowly, not putting them back in any particular order. She did, however, make sure they were properly righted together into a neat stack once more. Pulling them against her chest, she positioned herself in a way that said she'd claw the eyes out of anyone who tried to take them from her.
Gaze following her last remaining brother, Xene lifted her chin slightly. "You knew Zacharias, Stephanos. If there was something he did not want to do, he would not do it, no matter the cost..." she said quietly, "Dutiful and prepared he was, but he was prepared to give you the crown. There was no... intention at all to produce an heir and you and I both saw it without ever actually seeing it. Selene of Leventi threw herself at him for years and he never once even drew bated breath in her direction. Ladies of the court fluttered to him, but his eyes were never on them, nor were his hands. He wasn't being chaste or proprietous... he was taking a stand against everything he did not want in this life."
At the final question of how long she had known, Xene's expression changed. Instead of pleading with him, she was glaring in his direction. "Maybe next time you won't ignore my invitations," she pointed out without actually answering the question. It was answer enough. Incriminating enough. She'd been trying to tell her hard-headed king for weeks, and he'd ignored every invitation.
"I may not be Queen or council, Stephanos, but I am still your sister and I still have eyes and ears in this court. I did not claw my way to the top of the court social ladder on chittering about with gossip on my lips. I got here because I pay attention and I tell you what you need to know when you need to know it, my king," she said the last words through clenched teeth.
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Xene had placed herself on the other side of the lounge, her fingertips trailing wood and fabric as she observed her brother reading the letters. At first, he saw fit to argue the point that their brother hadn't wanted to be king, but reading further, Xene realized that he'd taken to the idea quickly. Whether he wanted to or not, he'd started to get the point that Xene was making about their brother.
She herself had been distraught with the knowledge. It had taken days to wrap her mind around it, but she hadn't come away disgusted. Picturing her brother with another man was no different than her picturing herself with a woman. A habit she'd made young into her life when men had been of no particular interest and inexperience with romance had made her wary of the male gaze. While confident, Xene had no particular foothold in her ability to satisfy a man. Her chastity stood in the way of that. Her imagination had simply been a filter, an escape.
But that was one thing that Xene would never utter to anyone. Not even her own brother. On the list of things you did and did not tell your closest sibling was the fact that you had, and still did from time to time, fancy the ladies of the court in addition to the men.
It was when the papers went flying that her breath caught and she rushed forward. Despite the fact that they were written in the hand of another man, these letters had still been cherished and cared for by her brother. And Xene struggled to let go of the things that her brother owned and favored. Even so, Xene knew in the back of her mind that these letters would not survive this meeting with her brother. That didn't mean she wasn't going to savor them for a time.
Bending slowly, Xene gathered each paper slowly, not putting them back in any particular order. She did, however, make sure they were properly righted together into a neat stack once more. Pulling them against her chest, she positioned herself in a way that said she'd claw the eyes out of anyone who tried to take them from her.
Gaze following her last remaining brother, Xene lifted her chin slightly. "You knew Zacharias, Stephanos. If there was something he did not want to do, he would not do it, no matter the cost..." she said quietly, "Dutiful and prepared he was, but he was prepared to give you the crown. There was no... intention at all to produce an heir and you and I both saw it without ever actually seeing it. Selene of Leventi threw herself at him for years and he never once even drew bated breath in her direction. Ladies of the court fluttered to him, but his eyes were never on them, nor were his hands. He wasn't being chaste or proprietous... he was taking a stand against everything he did not want in this life."
At the final question of how long she had known, Xene's expression changed. Instead of pleading with him, she was glaring in his direction. "Maybe next time you won't ignore my invitations," she pointed out without actually answering the question. It was answer enough. Incriminating enough. She'd been trying to tell her hard-headed king for weeks, and he'd ignored every invitation.
"I may not be Queen or council, Stephanos, but I am still your sister and I still have eyes and ears in this court. I did not claw my way to the top of the court social ladder on chittering about with gossip on my lips. I got here because I pay attention and I tell you what you need to know when you need to know it, my king," she said the last words through clenched teeth.
Xene had placed herself on the other side of the lounge, her fingertips trailing wood and fabric as she observed her brother reading the letters. At first, he saw fit to argue the point that their brother hadn't wanted to be king, but reading further, Xene realized that he'd taken to the idea quickly. Whether he wanted to or not, he'd started to get the point that Xene was making about their brother.
She herself had been distraught with the knowledge. It had taken days to wrap her mind around it, but she hadn't come away disgusted. Picturing her brother with another man was no different than her picturing herself with a woman. A habit she'd made young into her life when men had been of no particular interest and inexperience with romance had made her wary of the male gaze. While confident, Xene had no particular foothold in her ability to satisfy a man. Her chastity stood in the way of that. Her imagination had simply been a filter, an escape.
But that was one thing that Xene would never utter to anyone. Not even her own brother. On the list of things you did and did not tell your closest sibling was the fact that you had, and still did from time to time, fancy the ladies of the court in addition to the men.
It was when the papers went flying that her breath caught and she rushed forward. Despite the fact that they were written in the hand of another man, these letters had still been cherished and cared for by her brother. And Xene struggled to let go of the things that her brother owned and favored. Even so, Xene knew in the back of her mind that these letters would not survive this meeting with her brother. That didn't mean she wasn't going to savor them for a time.
Bending slowly, Xene gathered each paper slowly, not putting them back in any particular order. She did, however, make sure they were properly righted together into a neat stack once more. Pulling them against her chest, she positioned herself in a way that said she'd claw the eyes out of anyone who tried to take them from her.
Gaze following her last remaining brother, Xene lifted her chin slightly. "You knew Zacharias, Stephanos. If there was something he did not want to do, he would not do it, no matter the cost..." she said quietly, "Dutiful and prepared he was, but he was prepared to give you the crown. There was no... intention at all to produce an heir and you and I both saw it without ever actually seeing it. Selene of Leventi threw herself at him for years and he never once even drew bated breath in her direction. Ladies of the court fluttered to him, but his eyes were never on them, nor were his hands. He wasn't being chaste or proprietous... he was taking a stand against everything he did not want in this life."
At the final question of how long she had known, Xene's expression changed. Instead of pleading with him, she was glaring in his direction. "Maybe next time you won't ignore my invitations," she pointed out without actually answering the question. It was answer enough. Incriminating enough. She'd been trying to tell her hard-headed king for weeks, and he'd ignored every invitation.
"I may not be Queen or council, Stephanos, but I am still your sister and I still have eyes and ears in this court. I did not claw my way to the top of the court social ladder on chittering about with gossip on my lips. I got here because I pay attention and I tell you what you need to know when you need to know it, my king," she said the last words through clenched teeth.
"Maybe next time you won't ignore my invitations."
“Invitations,” he echoed with contempt. “This isn’t something that needed to wait until a convenient time. These invitations you’ve been sending were made to seem like you wanted company. And I haven’t had time, as you are no doubt aware.”
His anger toward her was only at half its usual level now but as he prowled about the room, his anger at the whole situation was growing every second. How could Zacharias do this to him? How could he have made this plan without ever consulting him? They had been the best of friends; friends as well as brothers. And yet Xene was right - he’d never noticed his brother had an eye for...men.
This felt like a gross betrayal of the highest order and what made it more infuriating than anything else was that his rage could only be directed at the ghost of a memory...or his sister. She was the only other living being in this room, besides her damned cat and Stephanos found himself ready to filet her alive for keeping this sort of information to herself for so long and blaming him for not coming to dinner.
“You should have come and found me. Or, or brought this to me the second you found it. Do you know what a fool this makes me?” The volume of his voice was already loud and climbing. “I never wanted to be king!” he shouted, red in the face. “He should have told me!”
Warned, was really the word. He should have been warned. Because he was woefully under prepared and outnumbered. Now it felt like Xene was attacking him too.
Her insistence that she told him what he needed to know, only when he needed to know it drove him over the edge. In his pacing, he passed her desk. A little clay statue of some goddess sat atop it. Stephanos jerked it up and hurled it across the room. The thing shattered in a million and a half pieces. Their mother, Elise, tended to do the same thing when she was enraged and now that he’d done it, it made him even angrier that he’d lost control in this manner.
Dropping down into her desk chair, he turned his back on her and buried his face in his hands. This argument was going around in circles; stupid and unsolvable because the one he should have been yelling at was dead, and his true enemy was not his sister. He felt lost.
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"Maybe next time you won't ignore my invitations."
“Invitations,” he echoed with contempt. “This isn’t something that needed to wait until a convenient time. These invitations you’ve been sending were made to seem like you wanted company. And I haven’t had time, as you are no doubt aware.”
His anger toward her was only at half its usual level now but as he prowled about the room, his anger at the whole situation was growing every second. How could Zacharias do this to him? How could he have made this plan without ever consulting him? They had been the best of friends; friends as well as brothers. And yet Xene was right - he’d never noticed his brother had an eye for...men.
This felt like a gross betrayal of the highest order and what made it more infuriating than anything else was that his rage could only be directed at the ghost of a memory...or his sister. She was the only other living being in this room, besides her damned cat and Stephanos found himself ready to filet her alive for keeping this sort of information to herself for so long and blaming him for not coming to dinner.
“You should have come and found me. Or, or brought this to me the second you found it. Do you know what a fool this makes me?” The volume of his voice was already loud and climbing. “I never wanted to be king!” he shouted, red in the face. “He should have told me!”
Warned, was really the word. He should have been warned. Because he was woefully under prepared and outnumbered. Now it felt like Xene was attacking him too.
Her insistence that she told him what he needed to know, only when he needed to know it drove him over the edge. In his pacing, he passed her desk. A little clay statue of some goddess sat atop it. Stephanos jerked it up and hurled it across the room. The thing shattered in a million and a half pieces. Their mother, Elise, tended to do the same thing when she was enraged and now that he’d done it, it made him even angrier that he’d lost control in this manner.
Dropping down into her desk chair, he turned his back on her and buried his face in his hands. This argument was going around in circles; stupid and unsolvable because the one he should have been yelling at was dead, and his true enemy was not his sister. He felt lost.
"Maybe next time you won't ignore my invitations."
“Invitations,” he echoed with contempt. “This isn’t something that needed to wait until a convenient time. These invitations you’ve been sending were made to seem like you wanted company. And I haven’t had time, as you are no doubt aware.”
His anger toward her was only at half its usual level now but as he prowled about the room, his anger at the whole situation was growing every second. How could Zacharias do this to him? How could he have made this plan without ever consulting him? They had been the best of friends; friends as well as brothers. And yet Xene was right - he’d never noticed his brother had an eye for...men.
This felt like a gross betrayal of the highest order and what made it more infuriating than anything else was that his rage could only be directed at the ghost of a memory...or his sister. She was the only other living being in this room, besides her damned cat and Stephanos found himself ready to filet her alive for keeping this sort of information to herself for so long and blaming him for not coming to dinner.
“You should have come and found me. Or, or brought this to me the second you found it. Do you know what a fool this makes me?” The volume of his voice was already loud and climbing. “I never wanted to be king!” he shouted, red in the face. “He should have told me!”
Warned, was really the word. He should have been warned. Because he was woefully under prepared and outnumbered. Now it felt like Xene was attacking him too.
Her insistence that she told him what he needed to know, only when he needed to know it drove him over the edge. In his pacing, he passed her desk. A little clay statue of some goddess sat atop it. Stephanos jerked it up and hurled it across the room. The thing shattered in a million and a half pieces. Their mother, Elise, tended to do the same thing when she was enraged and now that he’d done it, it made him even angrier that he’d lost control in this manner.
Dropping down into her desk chair, he turned his back on her and buried his face in his hands. This argument was going around in circles; stupid and unsolvable because the one he should have been yelling at was dead, and his true enemy was not his sister. He felt lost.
No, maybe it wasn't something that should have waited until a convenient time. However, Xene had her reasons for not telling him any sooner than when he attended on her. Partly because she had not been able to initially find the words to explain to him what she had found. Then there had been the shame that came with knowing their brother had... other tastes and what that knowledge, had it been made public, would have done to their family. To their father and their mother, their lineage as a whole.
Xene didn't blame Stephanos for being angry at her, but she wouldn't apologize for taking her time with a matter so delicate. When Stephanos started to pace about the room, yelling at her for not telling him sooner, she followed him close behind, hissing at him to keep his voice down. Xene herself had spies in the palati, but so did others.
This was not something that could be shared outside of this room. Xene would not allow that. Could not allow that. Because it put more than just their family in jeporady.
Her words were cut off, however, when Stephanos picked up her favored statue of Hera, throwing it across the room. Xene ducked and her cat shot away and underneat her bed. Straightening up, Xene caught her breath, her gaze on the shattered statue that had been a gift from Zach and felt her heart jump into her throat at the sudden jab of heartbreak that gripped her. Another piece of him gone. And with each day, more followed.
But she steeled herself, blinking away the threat of tears and turning back toward Stephanos. Approaching on quiet feet, Xene reached out slowly, pressing both hands to Stephanos' shoulders. Leaning in, her hands slipped further forward until she'd wrapped her arms around his neck from behind and pressed her forehead into his shoulder. "Zacharias' choices don't make you a fool, Stephanos," she said very quietly, "Because then we were all fools to never see it. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier," Xene added then, her grip tightening slightly. "It is a matter that... I wasn't sure how to talk about... I figured the first time you actually came to see me I'd find the courage to tell you."
There was a long pause while Xene continued to embrace her brother, staring over his shoulder at the spot on the desk that the statue had been. The princess swallowed hard. "Would him telling you have made any difference? The outcome, you becoming king, would have been the same..." she whispered, "Zacharias was dutiful, but he was not above embarrassment, and this would have brought immense shame upon him. I'm sure he knew that."
Finally, Xene lifted herself a bit, resting her chin atop his head for a moment while she debated her next words. They were painful, considering the fact that the letters symbolized a part of Zach that Xene had never truly known. And one she wasn't sure that she truly wanted to give up just yet. "I'm going to burn those letters."
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No, maybe it wasn't something that should have waited until a convenient time. However, Xene had her reasons for not telling him any sooner than when he attended on her. Partly because she had not been able to initially find the words to explain to him what she had found. Then there had been the shame that came with knowing their brother had... other tastes and what that knowledge, had it been made public, would have done to their family. To their father and their mother, their lineage as a whole.
Xene didn't blame Stephanos for being angry at her, but she wouldn't apologize for taking her time with a matter so delicate. When Stephanos started to pace about the room, yelling at her for not telling him sooner, she followed him close behind, hissing at him to keep his voice down. Xene herself had spies in the palati, but so did others.
This was not something that could be shared outside of this room. Xene would not allow that. Could not allow that. Because it put more than just their family in jeporady.
Her words were cut off, however, when Stephanos picked up her favored statue of Hera, throwing it across the room. Xene ducked and her cat shot away and underneat her bed. Straightening up, Xene caught her breath, her gaze on the shattered statue that had been a gift from Zach and felt her heart jump into her throat at the sudden jab of heartbreak that gripped her. Another piece of him gone. And with each day, more followed.
But she steeled herself, blinking away the threat of tears and turning back toward Stephanos. Approaching on quiet feet, Xene reached out slowly, pressing both hands to Stephanos' shoulders. Leaning in, her hands slipped further forward until she'd wrapped her arms around his neck from behind and pressed her forehead into his shoulder. "Zacharias' choices don't make you a fool, Stephanos," she said very quietly, "Because then we were all fools to never see it. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier," Xene added then, her grip tightening slightly. "It is a matter that... I wasn't sure how to talk about... I figured the first time you actually came to see me I'd find the courage to tell you."
There was a long pause while Xene continued to embrace her brother, staring over his shoulder at the spot on the desk that the statue had been. The princess swallowed hard. "Would him telling you have made any difference? The outcome, you becoming king, would have been the same..." she whispered, "Zacharias was dutiful, but he was not above embarrassment, and this would have brought immense shame upon him. I'm sure he knew that."
Finally, Xene lifted herself a bit, resting her chin atop his head for a moment while she debated her next words. They were painful, considering the fact that the letters symbolized a part of Zach that Xene had never truly known. And one she wasn't sure that she truly wanted to give up just yet. "I'm going to burn those letters."
No, maybe it wasn't something that should have waited until a convenient time. However, Xene had her reasons for not telling him any sooner than when he attended on her. Partly because she had not been able to initially find the words to explain to him what she had found. Then there had been the shame that came with knowing their brother had... other tastes and what that knowledge, had it been made public, would have done to their family. To their father and their mother, their lineage as a whole.
Xene didn't blame Stephanos for being angry at her, but she wouldn't apologize for taking her time with a matter so delicate. When Stephanos started to pace about the room, yelling at her for not telling him sooner, she followed him close behind, hissing at him to keep his voice down. Xene herself had spies in the palati, but so did others.
This was not something that could be shared outside of this room. Xene would not allow that. Could not allow that. Because it put more than just their family in jeporady.
Her words were cut off, however, when Stephanos picked up her favored statue of Hera, throwing it across the room. Xene ducked and her cat shot away and underneat her bed. Straightening up, Xene caught her breath, her gaze on the shattered statue that had been a gift from Zach and felt her heart jump into her throat at the sudden jab of heartbreak that gripped her. Another piece of him gone. And with each day, more followed.
But she steeled herself, blinking away the threat of tears and turning back toward Stephanos. Approaching on quiet feet, Xene reached out slowly, pressing both hands to Stephanos' shoulders. Leaning in, her hands slipped further forward until she'd wrapped her arms around his neck from behind and pressed her forehead into his shoulder. "Zacharias' choices don't make you a fool, Stephanos," she said very quietly, "Because then we were all fools to never see it. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you earlier," Xene added then, her grip tightening slightly. "It is a matter that... I wasn't sure how to talk about... I figured the first time you actually came to see me I'd find the courage to tell you."
There was a long pause while Xene continued to embrace her brother, staring over his shoulder at the spot on the desk that the statue had been. The princess swallowed hard. "Would him telling you have made any difference? The outcome, you becoming king, would have been the same..." she whispered, "Zacharias was dutiful, but he was not above embarrassment, and this would have brought immense shame upon him. I'm sure he knew that."
Finally, Xene lifted herself a bit, resting her chin atop his head for a moment while she debated her next words. They were painful, considering the fact that the letters symbolized a part of Zach that Xene had never truly known. And one she wasn't sure that she truly wanted to give up just yet. "I'm going to burn those letters."
He didn’t move as he heard her coming towards him. Neither did he move when she set her hands on his shoulders. The touch was far gentler than he might have expected. After all, he’d just broken something of hers. He did not know it had been a gift from their brother, or else he would have let his anger loose on something else. The damage was done now and it was better that he was ignorant of the pain he’d inadvertently inflicted on her.
They were each silent for a minute or so. Soft breezes flitted about the room, lifting the edges of a few letters Xene had missed, scattered and nearly under the low couch. The papers skittered and hissed quietly across the floor. He half turned to look at them as Xene leaned down fully and hugged him from behind. Turning back, he rested one hand on her crossed arms and listened as she told him that Zacharias’s choices didn’t make him a fool.
He’d have to disagree with her there.
She then asked the more painful question of whether or not it would have made a difference as to whether he’d have known he was to be king anyway or not. “Perhaps it would not have changed my predicament,” he said slowly when she paused. “But I would’ve done things differently.” His thoughts went immediately to his obviously rushed marriage to Olympia. How he’d always planned to marry higher and definitely not into that family.
However, the longer that he was married to Pia, the less he was regretting the decision. They’d been having fun before, sure, but he’d never once thought of her as a potential wife. Now that there was really no going back on it, he was finding that there really wasn’t anyone else who would have been as perfect for him as she was turning out to be. He’d lucked out in that, with her.
Beyond his rushed marriage, he wouldn’t have been as wild as he’d been for as long as he could remember. He liked to think he would have listened to Zacharias’s attempts to get him to be a bit more discrete, and maybe heeded his father’s advice about learning his place. Even Xene’s advice had been in that direction for ages. Now, here they were. He hadn’t listened to anyone but his own desires and it was showing.
But his brother was such a hypocrite. Acting like everything he did was for the good of the kingdom when he might have been planning to abdicate the whole time. The thought made Stephanos angry beyond reason. It was useless to be furious with the dead, however.
“As well it should have brought shame,” Stephanos said venomously. “While he was alive…” he leaned back a bit and Xene raised up to rest her chin on the top of his head. When she mentioned burning the letters, Stephanos tipped his head up to look at her. “A good idea. I think it would send mother into a tizzy if she saw them...and I don’t want Gianna to know. Ever. Let at least one of us think of Zacharias as perfect.”
He sighed and then pushed away from the desk, breaking gently away from his sister’s embrace. Once he was standing, he turned and eyed the errant letters that still lay on the floor. It was the work of a moment to pick the rest of the four or five that had escaped Xene. He held them in his hands, looking down at the handwriting from a man he did not know, saying things he really shouldn’t be reading. It was...unsettling.
“Let’s burn them now.”
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He didn’t move as he heard her coming towards him. Neither did he move when she set her hands on his shoulders. The touch was far gentler than he might have expected. After all, he’d just broken something of hers. He did not know it had been a gift from their brother, or else he would have let his anger loose on something else. The damage was done now and it was better that he was ignorant of the pain he’d inadvertently inflicted on her.
They were each silent for a minute or so. Soft breezes flitted about the room, lifting the edges of a few letters Xene had missed, scattered and nearly under the low couch. The papers skittered and hissed quietly across the floor. He half turned to look at them as Xene leaned down fully and hugged him from behind. Turning back, he rested one hand on her crossed arms and listened as she told him that Zacharias’s choices didn’t make him a fool.
He’d have to disagree with her there.
She then asked the more painful question of whether or not it would have made a difference as to whether he’d have known he was to be king anyway or not. “Perhaps it would not have changed my predicament,” he said slowly when she paused. “But I would’ve done things differently.” His thoughts went immediately to his obviously rushed marriage to Olympia. How he’d always planned to marry higher and definitely not into that family.
However, the longer that he was married to Pia, the less he was regretting the decision. They’d been having fun before, sure, but he’d never once thought of her as a potential wife. Now that there was really no going back on it, he was finding that there really wasn’t anyone else who would have been as perfect for him as she was turning out to be. He’d lucked out in that, with her.
Beyond his rushed marriage, he wouldn’t have been as wild as he’d been for as long as he could remember. He liked to think he would have listened to Zacharias’s attempts to get him to be a bit more discrete, and maybe heeded his father’s advice about learning his place. Even Xene’s advice had been in that direction for ages. Now, here they were. He hadn’t listened to anyone but his own desires and it was showing.
But his brother was such a hypocrite. Acting like everything he did was for the good of the kingdom when he might have been planning to abdicate the whole time. The thought made Stephanos angry beyond reason. It was useless to be furious with the dead, however.
“As well it should have brought shame,” Stephanos said venomously. “While he was alive…” he leaned back a bit and Xene raised up to rest her chin on the top of his head. When she mentioned burning the letters, Stephanos tipped his head up to look at her. “A good idea. I think it would send mother into a tizzy if she saw them...and I don’t want Gianna to know. Ever. Let at least one of us think of Zacharias as perfect.”
He sighed and then pushed away from the desk, breaking gently away from his sister’s embrace. Once he was standing, he turned and eyed the errant letters that still lay on the floor. It was the work of a moment to pick the rest of the four or five that had escaped Xene. He held them in his hands, looking down at the handwriting from a man he did not know, saying things he really shouldn’t be reading. It was...unsettling.
“Let’s burn them now.”
He didn’t move as he heard her coming towards him. Neither did he move when she set her hands on his shoulders. The touch was far gentler than he might have expected. After all, he’d just broken something of hers. He did not know it had been a gift from their brother, or else he would have let his anger loose on something else. The damage was done now and it was better that he was ignorant of the pain he’d inadvertently inflicted on her.
They were each silent for a minute or so. Soft breezes flitted about the room, lifting the edges of a few letters Xene had missed, scattered and nearly under the low couch. The papers skittered and hissed quietly across the floor. He half turned to look at them as Xene leaned down fully and hugged him from behind. Turning back, he rested one hand on her crossed arms and listened as she told him that Zacharias’s choices didn’t make him a fool.
He’d have to disagree with her there.
She then asked the more painful question of whether or not it would have made a difference as to whether he’d have known he was to be king anyway or not. “Perhaps it would not have changed my predicament,” he said slowly when she paused. “But I would’ve done things differently.” His thoughts went immediately to his obviously rushed marriage to Olympia. How he’d always planned to marry higher and definitely not into that family.
However, the longer that he was married to Pia, the less he was regretting the decision. They’d been having fun before, sure, but he’d never once thought of her as a potential wife. Now that there was really no going back on it, he was finding that there really wasn’t anyone else who would have been as perfect for him as she was turning out to be. He’d lucked out in that, with her.
Beyond his rushed marriage, he wouldn’t have been as wild as he’d been for as long as he could remember. He liked to think he would have listened to Zacharias’s attempts to get him to be a bit more discrete, and maybe heeded his father’s advice about learning his place. Even Xene’s advice had been in that direction for ages. Now, here they were. He hadn’t listened to anyone but his own desires and it was showing.
But his brother was such a hypocrite. Acting like everything he did was for the good of the kingdom when he might have been planning to abdicate the whole time. The thought made Stephanos angry beyond reason. It was useless to be furious with the dead, however.
“As well it should have brought shame,” Stephanos said venomously. “While he was alive…” he leaned back a bit and Xene raised up to rest her chin on the top of his head. When she mentioned burning the letters, Stephanos tipped his head up to look at her. “A good idea. I think it would send mother into a tizzy if she saw them...and I don’t want Gianna to know. Ever. Let at least one of us think of Zacharias as perfect.”
He sighed and then pushed away from the desk, breaking gently away from his sister’s embrace. Once he was standing, he turned and eyed the errant letters that still lay on the floor. It was the work of a moment to pick the rest of the four or five that had escaped Xene. He held them in his hands, looking down at the handwriting from a man he did not know, saying things he really shouldn’t be reading. It was...unsettling.
“Let’s burn them now.”
There had always been the chance that Zacharias would have remained king, only to never take a queen or sire children. Regardless of how things had come about, whether he had abdicated or simply refrained from performing one of his vital duties as king, the end result would have been the same. Whether in his thirties or his sixties, if Stephanos had still been alive, there had always been the chance of the crown landing in his lap. It was unavoidable. Fated. There would have been little other option given to him. The thought pained her.
Stephanos had always made it clear that he was not interest in ruling. Even more, he'd always acted as if ruling the Kingdom would be the very last thing he would ever do. Her mind drifted briefly to moments past when she and her brother were wild and free. When they had found more trouble and more fun that likely should have been afforded them. Because it had always been Zacharias who had been under the watchful eye of their father. It had been Zacharias who had taken the brunt of the criticism, the pressure, and the training.
All so that one day he would sit upon a thrown he had no intention of passing to any offspring. All so that he could suffer in silence while the lover who had so lovingly written these words watched from afar. Relegated to stolen moments and shrouded darkness. The thought of her brother being forced to live in such a way made her stomach turn. Xene had no idea how they had done it for so long. How Zacharias had not snapped and simply disappeared into the night with his lover at his back and no further thought of Kingdom or the looming shadow of a heavy crown.
Xene held no opinion of her brother's sexuality, but it terrified her to know that love could have such a strong pull. What else would Zacharias had done for the love of the man in these letters? What would he have given up in the pursuit of freedom and a love he was technically not allowed to have? When expectation had become too much, what would have happened to him had his life not been cut short in such a brutal manner?
The princess had lain her head on top of her brother's, her thoughts running away with her.
"If you were a fool... so was our father. So were we all," Xene added as an afterthought to their previous conversation.
The woman seemed to relax when her affections were reciprocated, standing there quietly as Stephanos spoke. Xene couldn't blame him for feeling angry toward their brother, but the fact of it was that Zacharias was dead and gone. There was no reason to curse a man who no longer had the stability of his own life to defend himself. Defend his actions. Defend his thoughts and feelings. There was an entire half to these letters that neither Stephanos or Xene could see. Zacharias' words were missing; held by another person and away from the two of them. Whatever Zacharias had been writing in return was not something they could even begin to guess. There were likely feelings, emotions, regrets, and everything in between that they would never know about.
It didn't seem right to curse a man when they didn't know both halves of the story. Or even a quarter of what went on between their brother and his unknown lover. When Stephanos tipped his head back, Xene pressed a kiss right against his forehead as an illustration that she could still be the doting, loving sister that he had grown up with. And then they were pulling away from one another. Stephanos had moved about the room, searching for the stray letters that had been thrown about her quarters.
There was a rock in the pit of her stomach as the princess moved across the room to a large clay pot that was used for decoration in a shadowed and unused corner of the room. Dragging it across the stone floor, she placed it in the center of the room. Acquiring a jug of water, a small oil lamp, and the remaining stack of papers. Reaching out, Xene was careful to take the papers from him, absently ordering them back into the stack. The fabric of her gown trailed across the floor with a very soft hiss, not unlike the breeze that blew through her rooms. The sound cut through her in the otherwise silent room, blue eyes staring briefly down at the stack of letters.
Another piece of Zacharias that had been cherished. Coveted. Hidden so that only he could enjoy the words and affections of his lover in the quiet of his quarters. Breathing in very slowly, Xene lit the small oil lamp, her fingers trembling as she held the corner of the stack of papers into the illuminating flame.
Holding the letters up into open air, Xene watched the small blaze devour the edges of the papers until the fire was almost too hot on her hand to handle. Then, bending down, her golden curls cascading over delicate shoulders, she dropped the burning letters into the bottom of the clay pot at her feet. Blue eyes watched in complete silence as the papers burned to ash before her eyes, their fading words still loud and clear in her mind. She would never forget the only passionate love her brother had ever known, carrying the unknown man's words in hopes that maybe she could find and soothe whatever aching soul had been left behind in the wake of her brother's murder.
Then Xene turned away from the burning pot, moving across the room to start picking up the shattered pieces of the statue of Hera. She avoided every thought and impulse of potentially turning back and saving yet another last relic of her brother's life. Breathing out through her nose, she cleared her throat, "You have nothing left to worry about. Mother and Gianna will never find out. Nor will our Uncle. This secret, Zacharias' secret, goes to our graves, Stephanos. Do we have an agreement?"
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There had always been the chance that Zacharias would have remained king, only to never take a queen or sire children. Regardless of how things had come about, whether he had abdicated or simply refrained from performing one of his vital duties as king, the end result would have been the same. Whether in his thirties or his sixties, if Stephanos had still been alive, there had always been the chance of the crown landing in his lap. It was unavoidable. Fated. There would have been little other option given to him. The thought pained her.
Stephanos had always made it clear that he was not interest in ruling. Even more, he'd always acted as if ruling the Kingdom would be the very last thing he would ever do. Her mind drifted briefly to moments past when she and her brother were wild and free. When they had found more trouble and more fun that likely should have been afforded them. Because it had always been Zacharias who had been under the watchful eye of their father. It had been Zacharias who had taken the brunt of the criticism, the pressure, and the training.
All so that one day he would sit upon a thrown he had no intention of passing to any offspring. All so that he could suffer in silence while the lover who had so lovingly written these words watched from afar. Relegated to stolen moments and shrouded darkness. The thought of her brother being forced to live in such a way made her stomach turn. Xene had no idea how they had done it for so long. How Zacharias had not snapped and simply disappeared into the night with his lover at his back and no further thought of Kingdom or the looming shadow of a heavy crown.
Xene held no opinion of her brother's sexuality, but it terrified her to know that love could have such a strong pull. What else would Zacharias had done for the love of the man in these letters? What would he have given up in the pursuit of freedom and a love he was technically not allowed to have? When expectation had become too much, what would have happened to him had his life not been cut short in such a brutal manner?
The princess had lain her head on top of her brother's, her thoughts running away with her.
"If you were a fool... so was our father. So were we all," Xene added as an afterthought to their previous conversation.
The woman seemed to relax when her affections were reciprocated, standing there quietly as Stephanos spoke. Xene couldn't blame him for feeling angry toward their brother, but the fact of it was that Zacharias was dead and gone. There was no reason to curse a man who no longer had the stability of his own life to defend himself. Defend his actions. Defend his thoughts and feelings. There was an entire half to these letters that neither Stephanos or Xene could see. Zacharias' words were missing; held by another person and away from the two of them. Whatever Zacharias had been writing in return was not something they could even begin to guess. There were likely feelings, emotions, regrets, and everything in between that they would never know about.
It didn't seem right to curse a man when they didn't know both halves of the story. Or even a quarter of what went on between their brother and his unknown lover. When Stephanos tipped his head back, Xene pressed a kiss right against his forehead as an illustration that she could still be the doting, loving sister that he had grown up with. And then they were pulling away from one another. Stephanos had moved about the room, searching for the stray letters that had been thrown about her quarters.
There was a rock in the pit of her stomach as the princess moved across the room to a large clay pot that was used for decoration in a shadowed and unused corner of the room. Dragging it across the stone floor, she placed it in the center of the room. Acquiring a jug of water, a small oil lamp, and the remaining stack of papers. Reaching out, Xene was careful to take the papers from him, absently ordering them back into the stack. The fabric of her gown trailed across the floor with a very soft hiss, not unlike the breeze that blew through her rooms. The sound cut through her in the otherwise silent room, blue eyes staring briefly down at the stack of letters.
Another piece of Zacharias that had been cherished. Coveted. Hidden so that only he could enjoy the words and affections of his lover in the quiet of his quarters. Breathing in very slowly, Xene lit the small oil lamp, her fingers trembling as she held the corner of the stack of papers into the illuminating flame.
Holding the letters up into open air, Xene watched the small blaze devour the edges of the papers until the fire was almost too hot on her hand to handle. Then, bending down, her golden curls cascading over delicate shoulders, she dropped the burning letters into the bottom of the clay pot at her feet. Blue eyes watched in complete silence as the papers burned to ash before her eyes, their fading words still loud and clear in her mind. She would never forget the only passionate love her brother had ever known, carrying the unknown man's words in hopes that maybe she could find and soothe whatever aching soul had been left behind in the wake of her brother's murder.
Then Xene turned away from the burning pot, moving across the room to start picking up the shattered pieces of the statue of Hera. She avoided every thought and impulse of potentially turning back and saving yet another last relic of her brother's life. Breathing out through her nose, she cleared her throat, "You have nothing left to worry about. Mother and Gianna will never find out. Nor will our Uncle. This secret, Zacharias' secret, goes to our graves, Stephanos. Do we have an agreement?"
There had always been the chance that Zacharias would have remained king, only to never take a queen or sire children. Regardless of how things had come about, whether he had abdicated or simply refrained from performing one of his vital duties as king, the end result would have been the same. Whether in his thirties or his sixties, if Stephanos had still been alive, there had always been the chance of the crown landing in his lap. It was unavoidable. Fated. There would have been little other option given to him. The thought pained her.
Stephanos had always made it clear that he was not interest in ruling. Even more, he'd always acted as if ruling the Kingdom would be the very last thing he would ever do. Her mind drifted briefly to moments past when she and her brother were wild and free. When they had found more trouble and more fun that likely should have been afforded them. Because it had always been Zacharias who had been under the watchful eye of their father. It had been Zacharias who had taken the brunt of the criticism, the pressure, and the training.
All so that one day he would sit upon a thrown he had no intention of passing to any offspring. All so that he could suffer in silence while the lover who had so lovingly written these words watched from afar. Relegated to stolen moments and shrouded darkness. The thought of her brother being forced to live in such a way made her stomach turn. Xene had no idea how they had done it for so long. How Zacharias had not snapped and simply disappeared into the night with his lover at his back and no further thought of Kingdom or the looming shadow of a heavy crown.
Xene held no opinion of her brother's sexuality, but it terrified her to know that love could have such a strong pull. What else would Zacharias had done for the love of the man in these letters? What would he have given up in the pursuit of freedom and a love he was technically not allowed to have? When expectation had become too much, what would have happened to him had his life not been cut short in such a brutal manner?
The princess had lain her head on top of her brother's, her thoughts running away with her.
"If you were a fool... so was our father. So were we all," Xene added as an afterthought to their previous conversation.
The woman seemed to relax when her affections were reciprocated, standing there quietly as Stephanos spoke. Xene couldn't blame him for feeling angry toward their brother, but the fact of it was that Zacharias was dead and gone. There was no reason to curse a man who no longer had the stability of his own life to defend himself. Defend his actions. Defend his thoughts and feelings. There was an entire half to these letters that neither Stephanos or Xene could see. Zacharias' words were missing; held by another person and away from the two of them. Whatever Zacharias had been writing in return was not something they could even begin to guess. There were likely feelings, emotions, regrets, and everything in between that they would never know about.
It didn't seem right to curse a man when they didn't know both halves of the story. Or even a quarter of what went on between their brother and his unknown lover. When Stephanos tipped his head back, Xene pressed a kiss right against his forehead as an illustration that she could still be the doting, loving sister that he had grown up with. And then they were pulling away from one another. Stephanos had moved about the room, searching for the stray letters that had been thrown about her quarters.
There was a rock in the pit of her stomach as the princess moved across the room to a large clay pot that was used for decoration in a shadowed and unused corner of the room. Dragging it across the stone floor, she placed it in the center of the room. Acquiring a jug of water, a small oil lamp, and the remaining stack of papers. Reaching out, Xene was careful to take the papers from him, absently ordering them back into the stack. The fabric of her gown trailed across the floor with a very soft hiss, not unlike the breeze that blew through her rooms. The sound cut through her in the otherwise silent room, blue eyes staring briefly down at the stack of letters.
Another piece of Zacharias that had been cherished. Coveted. Hidden so that only he could enjoy the words and affections of his lover in the quiet of his quarters. Breathing in very slowly, Xene lit the small oil lamp, her fingers trembling as she held the corner of the stack of papers into the illuminating flame.
Holding the letters up into open air, Xene watched the small blaze devour the edges of the papers until the fire was almost too hot on her hand to handle. Then, bending down, her golden curls cascading over delicate shoulders, she dropped the burning letters into the bottom of the clay pot at her feet. Blue eyes watched in complete silence as the papers burned to ash before her eyes, their fading words still loud and clear in her mind. She would never forget the only passionate love her brother had ever known, carrying the unknown man's words in hopes that maybe she could find and soothe whatever aching soul had been left behind in the wake of her brother's murder.
Then Xene turned away from the burning pot, moving across the room to start picking up the shattered pieces of the statue of Hera. She avoided every thought and impulse of potentially turning back and saving yet another last relic of her brother's life. Breathing out through her nose, she cleared her throat, "You have nothing left to worry about. Mother and Gianna will never find out. Nor will our Uncle. This secret, Zacharias' secret, goes to our graves, Stephanos. Do we have an agreement?"
,He joined her at the center of the room and handed her the papers when she reached for them. Relief flooded him at the burning of these letters. The last thing he wanted was for this information to get leaked to anyone. Even though it was about a dead man, the ruination of a character was very hard to undo - he would know.
Xene dropped the papers in so that they floated down, one by one. In this way, they were more easily consumed by flame, rather than in a big heap where air could get to them. She’d had the idea of burning them in this giant clay pot so readily that he wondered for a wild second what else she’d burned. There was very little for him to do as she took an oil lamp and set one of the pages ablaze. He watched it fall amongst its brothers and burn by itself for a few seconds.
Fire rarely stays contained and the danger spread to the rest. Soon the pot was alight with a healthy glow as the tender words of a man as yet unknown were turned to ash forever. Spots dotted his vision as he looked up from the fire at his sister. Their eyes met briefly but he looked away. This was shameful in a way that everything else in their lives was not. What they were doing had nothing to do with Zacharias and everything to do with themselves; keeping their image untarnished.
Xene turned away first, assuring him that he had nothing to concern himself with as far as their mother and sister went. He watched her back as she made sure that they were agreeing to absolute secrecy. “Of course,” he heard himself say. Somehow he sounded like someone else.
“Next time,” he said, dragging himself back into the present. “Do not wait for an opening. Just tell me.” A pause, and then, “I need to go.”
Part of him thought he should hug her before he left, but the other part didn’t want to. Whether they wanted it there or not, there was something between them; a gulf that he didn’t know how to cross. Eyeing her up and down for a moment, memorizing her as she was, just in case something awful happened between this time and the next, he turned and strode from the room. She was left to take care that no one found anything but ashes in the bottom of that pot.
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,He joined her at the center of the room and handed her the papers when she reached for them. Relief flooded him at the burning of these letters. The last thing he wanted was for this information to get leaked to anyone. Even though it was about a dead man, the ruination of a character was very hard to undo - he would know.
Xene dropped the papers in so that they floated down, one by one. In this way, they were more easily consumed by flame, rather than in a big heap where air could get to them. She’d had the idea of burning them in this giant clay pot so readily that he wondered for a wild second what else she’d burned. There was very little for him to do as she took an oil lamp and set one of the pages ablaze. He watched it fall amongst its brothers and burn by itself for a few seconds.
Fire rarely stays contained and the danger spread to the rest. Soon the pot was alight with a healthy glow as the tender words of a man as yet unknown were turned to ash forever. Spots dotted his vision as he looked up from the fire at his sister. Their eyes met briefly but he looked away. This was shameful in a way that everything else in their lives was not. What they were doing had nothing to do with Zacharias and everything to do with themselves; keeping their image untarnished.
Xene turned away first, assuring him that he had nothing to concern himself with as far as their mother and sister went. He watched her back as she made sure that they were agreeing to absolute secrecy. “Of course,” he heard himself say. Somehow he sounded like someone else.
“Next time,” he said, dragging himself back into the present. “Do not wait for an opening. Just tell me.” A pause, and then, “I need to go.”
Part of him thought he should hug her before he left, but the other part didn’t want to. Whether they wanted it there or not, there was something between them; a gulf that he didn’t know how to cross. Eyeing her up and down for a moment, memorizing her as she was, just in case something awful happened between this time and the next, he turned and strode from the room. She was left to take care that no one found anything but ashes in the bottom of that pot.
,He joined her at the center of the room and handed her the papers when she reached for them. Relief flooded him at the burning of these letters. The last thing he wanted was for this information to get leaked to anyone. Even though it was about a dead man, the ruination of a character was very hard to undo - he would know.
Xene dropped the papers in so that they floated down, one by one. In this way, they were more easily consumed by flame, rather than in a big heap where air could get to them. She’d had the idea of burning them in this giant clay pot so readily that he wondered for a wild second what else she’d burned. There was very little for him to do as she took an oil lamp and set one of the pages ablaze. He watched it fall amongst its brothers and burn by itself for a few seconds.
Fire rarely stays contained and the danger spread to the rest. Soon the pot was alight with a healthy glow as the tender words of a man as yet unknown were turned to ash forever. Spots dotted his vision as he looked up from the fire at his sister. Their eyes met briefly but he looked away. This was shameful in a way that everything else in their lives was not. What they were doing had nothing to do with Zacharias and everything to do with themselves; keeping their image untarnished.
Xene turned away first, assuring him that he had nothing to concern himself with as far as their mother and sister went. He watched her back as she made sure that they were agreeing to absolute secrecy. “Of course,” he heard himself say. Somehow he sounded like someone else.
“Next time,” he said, dragging himself back into the present. “Do not wait for an opening. Just tell me.” A pause, and then, “I need to go.”
Part of him thought he should hug her before he left, but the other part didn’t want to. Whether they wanted it there or not, there was something between them; a gulf that he didn’t know how to cross. Eyeing her up and down for a moment, memorizing her as she was, just in case something awful happened between this time and the next, he turned and strode from the room. She was left to take care that no one found anything but ashes in the bottom of that pot.
